Feeling the same feeling as suicidal guys.

    • Saruniks
      Saruniks
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      Joined: 30.08.2010 Posts: 1,213
      Ok, so I don't know why, but I feel like burning even when it is really cold. Feeling like I would like to punch something really bad. I don't know how to talk about that feeling any other way. But what the hell is this?
      I just want to die or something. (Not going to suicide though ever.)

      Am I addicted to poker or what?

      This is serious problem, I believe if I go to bed and sleep it will fix, but hell, I can't sleep at all. 2AM and my eyes are not even close to closing.

      What to do? Anyone felt the same feeling ever?

      Don't troll, this is not right place to troll.
  • 25 replies
    • supeyrio
      supeyrio
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      Joined: 11.11.2009 Posts: 3,106
      dont troll guys, if he died because u trolled, he may haunt u foreverrrrrrr
    • kennyclr
      kennyclr
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      Joined: 31.07.2010 Posts: 37
      Actually I had the same problem with you, and I'm actually having this emotion right now because I've just ran super bad since yesterday and lost all my hard earned winning from last week. I believe it's tilt, with depression. Just read an article i think it might help you. Not sure it helps but I hope someone could give us some advice though.

      http://www.anskypoker.com/2008/11/how-to-control-tilt/

      Another best idea is.. quit poker. Focus on life. That's what I intended to do.. but I think I'm addicted too. ?(
    • Saruniks
      Saruniks
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      Joined: 30.08.2010 Posts: 1,213
      Originally posted by kennyclr
      Actually I had the same problem with you, and I'm actually having this emotion right now because I've just ran super bad since yesterday and lost all my hard earned winning from last week. I believe it's tilt, with depression. Just read an article i think it might help you. Not sure it helps but I hope someone could give us some advice though.

      http://www.anskypoker.com/2008/11/how-to-control-tilt/

      Another best idea is.. quit poker. Focus on life. That's what I intended to do.. but I think I'm addicted too. ?(
      thanks. Yeah... Don't know what to do...
    • kennyclr
      kennyclr
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      Joined: 31.07.2010 Posts: 37
      Well... I think talk it out will be better, as myself I know that this emotions does not just comes from poker alone, which also includes other stuff in my life. SO I'm guessing you might have too, find someone you trust to talk about it. Or, just get a sleep.
    • Saruniks
      Saruniks
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      Joined: 30.08.2010 Posts: 1,213
      Originally posted by kennyclr
      Well... I think talk it out will be better, as myself I know that this emotions does not just comes from poker alone, which also includes other stuff in my life. SO I'm guessing you might have too, find someone you trust to talk about it. Or, just get a sleep.
      I don't want to act like a kid who says how bad his life is. Yeah it sucks hard, but hell, I have to come over with it somehow. I really would like to talk about that. But hell. I have no person to talk with.
    • kennyclr
      kennyclr
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      Joined: 31.07.2010 Posts: 37
      Well I would find a friend to talk about it from time to time... or maybe just drink some whisky to burn it down the throat, and wake up with a better mood and start thinking in a more positive way.
    • Saruniks
      Saruniks
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      Joined: 30.08.2010 Posts: 1,213
      Originally posted by kennyclr
      Well I would find a friend to talk about it from time to time... or maybe just drink some whisky to burn it down the throat, and wake up with a better mood and start thinking in a more positive way.
      I gues I will wait till my brain needs sleep to survive.
    • nibbana
      nibbana
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      Joined: 04.12.2009 Posts: 1,186
      How old are you OP ? What happens in the rest of your life ?
    • supeyrio
      supeyrio
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      Joined: 11.11.2009 Posts: 3,106
      [Edited by EagleStar88 - Trolling in threads where the OP is feeling down are totally unacceptable, even if only meant in jest, please be supportive to fellow members at all times]
    • nibbana
      nibbana
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      Joined: 04.12.2009 Posts: 1,186
      Originally posted by supeyrio
      Originally posted by nibbana
      How old are you OP ? What happens in the rest of your life ?
      [Removed by EagleStar88]
      so harsh to troll here...
    • stevegold87
      stevegold87
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      Joined: 18.06.2009 Posts: 2,640
      I think you should do sports --> Helps you sleep and release good hormones in your body :) . Specially if you feel very tense or angry
    • supeyrio
      supeyrio
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      Joined: 11.11.2009 Posts: 3,106
      [Edited by EagleStar88]
    • kennyclr
      kennyclr
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      Joined: 31.07.2010 Posts: 37
      Originally posted by supeyrio
      Originally posted by nibbana
      Originally posted by supeyrio
      Originally posted by nibbana
      How old are you OP ? What happens in the rest of your life ?
      rest of your life?
      suicide?
      did you read his post???
      so harsh to troll here...
      [Removed by EagleStar88]
      :f_frown:
      I don't think anyone would do that... i think OP's feeling is purely depression after some incidents in his real life and probably "luckily" to hit the bad beat streak in poker to trigger the feeling. I think even not with poker, if there's other incident that would happen will still trigger the same feeling.
    • Econom1sta
      Econom1sta
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      Joined: 27.01.2010 Posts: 130
      "Problem" is you are emotional. You invested yourself, you feel guilty for losing it. If poker is very important part of your life, it will lend a greater punch to your mind. You have to understand there are other things that can make you happy besides winning in poker.
    • EagleStar88
      EagleStar88
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      Joined: 06.10.2008 Posts: 7,359
      Already some great supportive replies received from fellow members here, great work, keep it up.

      I would however take this opportunity to remind everyone that trolling in the forum is not allowed (see Forum Principles).
      In the general forum we do of course tolerate a certain amount of friendly banter where it's obvious it's meant light heartedly, between friends and no one is likely to take offence. In the Psychology section however, trolling posts are totally unacceptable and unwelcome. Moderators will come down heavily on anyone not supporting their fellow community members during difficult times, which afterall we have all gone through (and continue to go through) from time to time.

      Please bear in mind that replies even made in fun with good intention can be easily taken the wrong way and cause offence or distress to someone currently going through a bad spell.

      This community is renowned for it's awesome community spirit and the friendliness of members to each other, let's ensure that we continue to do everything to support each other during those tough days.

      With grateful thanks,


      Bart

      Further reply with my own personal thoughts follows in a moment Saruniks :)
    • supeyrio
      supeyrio
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      Joined: 11.11.2009 Posts: 3,106
      oops forgot sry bart. i'm out of here
      but i wasnt trolling for the last part'

      gl
    • EagleStar88
      EagleStar88
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      Joined: 06.10.2008 Posts: 7,359
      Hi Saruniks,

      With apologies for the wall of text that follows.

      I know exactly what you mean when you say you feel you're burning up inside and cannot rest as I've had first hand experience of this myself on a number of occasions, both inside and outside of poker.

      Of course first & foremost I would always strongly recommend that you seek proper medical advice if you are at all worried about any symptoms. Whilst I and fellow community members can offer up suggestions as to what it might be and what you can try to help, there is absolutely no comparison for proper appropriate medical review & advice. Your doctor will always see you in strict confidence and will never mind you approaching them even if it turns out to be nothing to worry about.

      It is possible to become addicted to something, anything in fact and poker is no exception. In this scenario poker will likely be always on your mind or in your thoughts, you won't be able to rest and will feel compelled to play.
      Try to take a break from poker for a couple of days. Distracting yourself by trying other hobbies or activities, in particular ones that interest you might help.
      As they say, "variety is the spice of life", it's always good to have a variety of interests of which one of them can of course be poker.

      Of course even if you can't get poker out of your head, it's not always the case that you will be addicted to it. You might just be a little run down at the moment (tired) or frustrated at something and focusing more on one activity subconsciously. Frustration can easily result from a run of back luck in poker, but could equally be an external factor such as work/college, relationships, money worries etc or a combination of several at once. The actual cause might not always be obvious at first and will not always be serious.

      As you might already be aware from previous forum posts, I personally have been suffering from a condition called OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) for over 10 years. I won't bore you with all the in's and out's, but basically I have received a lot of different help, medication & therapy over the past few years with varying degrees of success.

      Anyway, the point I am long-windily trying to make is that my condition has a knock on effect on mood (depression), anxiety and frustration/anger. Even at the best of times I have to work hard sometimes to control these factors and even the slightest thing can send my frustration levels into warp mode.

      The problem with all of these factors (mood, anxiety, frustration, anger etc) is that they are quick to be activated but take time to fall back down.
      One isolated poker bad beat for example might be annoying and lead to a "damn" or "ffs" going through your mind (or the chat box :P ), but you can easily tolerate these and your frustration will fall back down after a while. A series of bad beats in quick sucession however just keeps building up frustation to higher and higher levels and will need longer to fall back down.

      I've found that the first key for myself personally is awareness. Be aware of how you are feeling at any given time. Try to rate yourself on 0 to 10 scale in terms of overall mood, frustration etc.
      I personally try to avoid starting a poker session when I'm feeling low or frustrated or limit myself to just a short session instead of a heavy grind or important tournament. Not always that easy I do appreciate.

      In terms of controlling mood, frustation, ability to relax etc, I've found some of the following really useful:

      • Simply taking a short break from whatever I'm doing and return to it later
      • Going out for a short walk. Fresh air does wonders for the head as well as the lungs and legs ;)
      • Breathing exercises/techniques #
      • Mindfullness (sitting and focusing your mind on a single happy thing or location)/meditation #
      • Always allow yourself a good half an hour or more to unwind and relax before going to bed. Don't attempt to go straight to bed after a heavy poker session or working late etc
      • "Variety is the spice of life" - have lots of different hobbies or activities that you like doing and mix them up. Don't just concentrate all of your time on one alone.
      • "Short & sweet" - I always play better poker when doing several short sessions as opposed to one long session.
      # You can find some good techniques on an internet search, but always seek medical advice and guidance first.

      Ok anyone still following at this stage probably deserves a medal, sorry for length of the post.
      The jist of what I wanted to put across however is don't worry adversely, it might be nothing and you might just be a little run down or frustrated with something, but do seek professional medical guidance if at all concerned.
      Try to think of whether you are playing poker because you enjoy it or because you feel compelled to do it?
      And try to take regular breaks and split up your poker sessions with other activities that you enjoy doing.

      Hope some of this helps, happy to expand on any aspect if anyone wants more info and do of course let us know how you're getting on. You know we are all there to help you if you need it :)

      Take care buddy and give me a shout anytime you feel you need a chat ;)

      Warmest regards,


      Bart
    • EagleStar88
      EagleStar88
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      Joined: 06.10.2008 Posts: 7,359
      Originally posted by supeyrio
      oops forgot sry bart. i'm out of here
      but i wasnt trolling for the last part'

      gl
      Thx supeyrio,

      Having known you for several years I know you are totally genuine and mean well, don't worry ;)

      My earlier post was just to remind everyone, not just yourself, that we all go through bad times and this community can actually be a great form of strength for us all during the dark days.

      If anyone else has any thoughts, experiences or suggestions for Saruniks, I'm sure they would really appreciate it.


      Bart
    • Saruniks
      Saruniks
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      Joined: 30.08.2010 Posts: 1,213
      thanks, it was very helpful post. I took a walk, it helped a bit. Then I turned on PC and typed here. After siting for a while on PC It got beter somehow. Maybe I listened for some music. Then I turned pc off and it started again. Then I got to sleep only on 4AM. Well I had to wake up on 6AM but I felt not tired, and so I don't feel tired at all even now. I feel really good when I am in church. But once I get out of there I feel sick again.

      Dunno, I may have some addictions.

      Maybe that's the problem for the many money travelling. I mean I am really poor, don't have a lot of clothes, don't live comfortably, but I play on NL25. That's sick. I don't know how to manage money. I mean I have 900$ on my account, but I don't know how much to withdraw and if it will be beter.

      Maybe that's not with poker. I had some bad sessions before, but after losing some money I didn't felt bad like this. Maybe real life.
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