A mental problem(?)

    • tommygecko
      tommygecko
      Bronze
      Joined: 11.08.2012 Posts: 1,229
      Well, I have one mental problem. Not so much affecting my game but it's kinda annoying me (and many others who actually care).

      There's some luck factor in poker. Sometimes I get lucky, sometimes others get lucky and suck me out with bad play. When i suck others out, I just keep quiet. But when others get lucky, I try to keep quiet, but sometimes i go crazy and curse at them, say nasty things to them like it's their fault they are lucky especially if they made a bad play or suck out several times in a row. A bit Phil Hellmuth-ish but perhaps worse. Sometimes I wish I could go in front of their screen and knock them out or something.

      It's happening quite often that I keep telling myself they don't control their luck, they are the ones who are your sources of income in poker and there are times I get lucky too. But in the middle of a mini downswing I just can't stop myself from being a brat.

      The good thing is I don't think it's really affecting my play (I've been playing for awhile, I know shit happens) but maybe this could affect me in the future? (career, social life etc.) I'm still young so I have to fix whatever I can before it's too late.

      I know you guys can't fix this for me of course. But maybe some of you guys have similar experiences? I already feel alot better typing this out. Hopefully it's another step to getting rid of this sick habit.
  • 12 replies
    • Gentari
      Gentari
      Global
      Joined: 08.05.2011 Posts: 344
      It is very natural to be annoyed when someone seems to have better luck or when someone cuts you off when driving or chats up a girl you like.

      You are right to challenge how this effect shows itself in you though.

      I think there are times when the human race shows how close to the animals we truly are, eg Mr Lion walks into a pride, fancies himself some lion ass and takes some. Daddy lion comes over and sorts it out with a fight. Now if Mr Lion beats Daddy lion he takes over and has all the Lion ass he likes while Daddy lion goes off and probably dies a lonely death...

      My point is remove yourself from the animal instinct and inject some logic into the issues you face,

      You are a competent player (I hope) and raise KK in the SB, BB calls cos he is in the BB and has some money invested. The flop comes down QhTs3h and you raise again for value but also to protect the hand from the possible draws.

      Some things can happen at this point...

      1. BB folds as he is not getting the correct odds to call
      2. BB calls because it's $2 and who cares, he has a pair/draw
      3. BB raises because he thinks you are full of crap
      4. BB raises because he has a legit hand, set of 3s perhaps

      So lets say he is a donk and thinks his 8h5h is cool and the turn brings a heart...

      What you gonna do?

      Lose as little as you can and wait for the next hand, let the donk pay you next time and off you go again.

      Disclaimer: I am a fish and like to make these plays too ;)
    • Styr
      Styr
      Bronze
      Joined: 11.03.2009 Posts: 408
      Such plays, i.e. the likes Gentari talks about are neither that uncommon, and one does not neccessarily have to be a total donk to do them - sometimes it might be a good idea to (semi)bluffcall - especially if you know you could get him fold on a later street.

      I tend not to get mad, even less so to tell the donks some nice things in the chat.

      I have, however done so, when someone makes a play so ridiculous and so incomprehensible. I have even offered to send them condoms, so the damage to the gene pool would be contained, but no one has accepted my gracious offer. :(

      I'll explain:

      - Villain minraises on SB, I re-raise ALL IN with AKs, for example, villain snapcalls with 32o.
      - Villain limps with ATC, I push him all in (Hyper turbo, 500 chips, 20/10 level), villain calls. (my favourites have been: 32o, T2o, J4s, and so on, so on) Some of them have limp-call percentage of 100. :D

      Simply put, people like them make me mad. Surely, I will win agains them in the long turn, but when my whole intention was to get his blinds (especially so in a Hyper Turbo), it does tend to make me mad. It means less stealing for me, and less profits as a result... or more winnings but way more variance.
    • gp00053
      gp00053
      Bronze
      Joined: 27.12.2010 Posts: 154
      [quote][i]Originally posted But maybe some of you guys have similar experiences? I already feel alot better typing this out. Hopefully it's another step to getting rid of this sick habit.[/quote]Not some , all guys have experienced what you are going through. It's one of the hardest problems to deal with and what's worse, everybody deals with it differently all you can do is trial and error to see what works for you until you realize going nuts doesn't help you only hurts and it takes a lot of sessions before it sinks in. the best place to start is posting your hands here along with your rant. That way you will get to discuss the particular hand with other players who will offer their opinions.
      Good Luck
    • MMPokerNab
      MMPokerNab
      Bronze
      Joined: 14.02.2012 Posts: 249
      i think it's normal to get mad - and it can be really funny when someone says "i'll give you coaching" and stuff like that when a bad player sucks out. dunno, makes the game more "lively" in my opinion.

      i think it becomes a problem if it's constant.. regular.. annoying name-calling harassment. and i have to mute that player because it's too ugly to watch/read.

      but anyway, i have player chat off anyway. :)
      except on 888. so much funny.

      i'm glad typing it out helped OP.
      you are smart to try to fix this if you think it's unpleasant.
      you definitively don't want to be an aggressive person who leashes out his anger, but control your emotions like yoda.
    • biogas
      biogas
      Gold
      Joined: 22.07.2010 Posts: 384
      Simple solution: play more tables, don't look at showdowns in game (stacking tables on each other helps), just after the session. This way you will play like a machine: no emotions, just maths.
    • Styr
      Styr
      Bronze
      Joined: 11.03.2009 Posts: 408
      Originally posted by biogas
      Simple solution: play more tables, don't look at showdowns in game (stacking tables on each other helps), just after the session. This way you will play like a machine: no emotions, just maths.
      While this would probably work, it would make making notes more difficult, if not impossible.
    • serverm07
      serverm07
      Basic
      Joined: 08.08.2012 Posts: 1,130
      Originally posted by biogas
      Simple solution: play more tables, don't look at showdowns in game (stacking tables on each other helps), just after the session. This way you will play like a machine: no emotions, just maths.
      There is no simple solution to this. Basically everyone goes through some sort of "tilting" experience. And you can only get good at controlling tilt with time and practice. We all know that poker is a game with luck involved, it's pretty simple and easy to understand. However we as people are creatures with emotions, we cry, we laugh, we get upset etc. And basically once we understand that whatever happened in the past can not be changed, and that moving forward we need to make the best decisions and not tilt, then we have figured out how to deal with tilt. And this doesn't only work just for poker, I played soccer for many years, I'm a very competitive person and I absolutely f**king hate losing and I get very upset after my team loses a game. Now the next day I can either stay pissed off and eat ice cream on the couch all day or go out on the field and practice to get better. And the thing is we can only control our emotions for so long or essentially "trick" our mind into thinking everything is fine and after a while it's just best to get away from whatever we are doing and breathe. My real life example would be relationships, I honestly don't have a huge amount of experience because I'm a slut and go for many girls but I'm sure you guys know what I mean. Also I think there is a huge difference from person to person in terms of how emotional they are. I know several people who have punched, broken their computer parts because of tilt and I have never even considered punching my monitor or anything close to that.

      Hope this helps.

      serverm07
    • metza
      metza
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.01.2012 Posts: 2,220
      Originally posted by serverm07
      I know several people who have punched, broken their computer parts because of tilt and I have never even considered punching my monitor or anything close to that.

      Hope this helps.

      serverm07
      I always thought people were joking when they said this, never thought anyone could actually have such bad control to break their computer. That shits expensive. :facepalm:
    • gp00053
      gp00053
      Bronze
      Joined: 27.12.2010 Posts: 154
      Originally posted by metza
      I always thought people were joking when they said this, never thought anyone could actually have such bad control to break their computer. That shits expensive. :facepalm:
      I never did the computer, but I have thrown the mouse against the wall in my early days. That's the secret, discipline and control. For most players easier said than done in their early days.
    • Resilence
      Resilence
      Bronze
      Joined: 10.03.2012 Posts: 934
      I usually end up breaking something of my self when this happens :P
      Fortuneately I don't hit super hard and destroy all my bones in my hand, but I still thnk I maybe should invest in a boxing sack :f_eek:

      But yeah injecting logic works, and is deffentially smething you have to do over and over and over and over again, it will only improve, if we practice, the mental game is also skill based ;)
    • DecMate
      DecMate
      Bronze
      Joined: 25.01.2009 Posts: 939
      If your frustrated express it, but don't be rude.
    • Avatars91
      Avatars91
      Bronze
      Joined: 18.12.2009 Posts: 2,689
      As long as you're rationally aware of this problem you should just keep playing and with time you'll just learn to accept these suckouts as a logical consequence of a game of probability.

      You can't keep tilting after the millionth time you've been suckout. It's just too ridiculous and senseless.

      So unless you're making a lot of mistakes and aren't improving, this shouldn't really be an issue after some time. This really is a characteristic that comes from experience.

      Also. Learn about variance:
      http://www.evplusplus.com/poker_tools/variance_simulator/