My struggle with tilt and micros

    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Hi everyone, my name is David, i am 21, been playing poker on and off for about 5 years. Currently living at home without a job due to issues with depression and social anxiety.

      Since learning poker, I've always had the dream of rising through the limits, improving my game and making a living from it. Of course, its not that easy. I have bought into several online sites before, struggled grinding a small profit, then losing it through a combination of tilt, poor bankroll management and a defeatist mind-set.

      But I am determined not to give up! Reading other blogs on PokerStrategy has really inspired me to give it a proper go. It wont be easy, but i feel keeping a track of my progress in a blog will help me with discipline, which is one of the main aspects i struggle with.

      So, without further ado, here's the plan. I currently have funds on 2 sites, PokerStars, which will be my main bankroll starting at just over 300$.
      Ill start with NLHE10 cash games Full ring, possibly branching out to 6max in the future. If i run into trouble ill will step down a limit to rebuild.

      My other funds are on Williamhill, which is tied to my PokerStrategy account, ill be using this to warm up my game each day with some smaller stakes zoom tables and to earn points to take advantage of the excellent learning tools on this site.

      I've invested in pokerstrategy4 to keep track of stats and graphs (who doesn't love graphs?!) and will try and post daily updates of my progress, aiming for at least 500 hands per day playing 2-4 tables.

      Ill have the first update posted by the end of the day, wish me luck!
  • 24 replies
    • nmilan84
      nmilan84
      Silver
      Joined: 21.07.2010 Posts: 378
      Will be following...

      GL @ the tables
    • gadget51
      gadget51
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      Joined: 23.06.2008 Posts: 5,622
      Hi David and welcome to blogging! :)

      We'll be keeping an eye on you so make sure you stick to good bankroll management won't you!

      Have fun at the tables and no tilting please. :f_cool:

      Mal.
    • spreeboy
      spreeboy
      Bronze
      Joined: 06.09.2010 Posts: 223
      Originally posted by david26551
      I've invested in pokerstrategy4 to keep track of stats and graphs (who doesn't love graphs?!) and will try and post daily updates of my progress, aiming for at least 500 hands per day playing 2-4 tables.
      Pokertracker 4. ;)

      Will visit this blog too if you update regularly... Good luck to you
    • RedStarUltras
      RedStarUltras
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      Joined: 16.04.2011 Posts: 393
      gl mate,will follow
    • Ramble
      Ramble
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      Joined: 17.11.2008 Posts: 1,421
      Good Luck David,

      We have some similar stories and bankrolls, except I am focusing on STT SnG's...

      I have family members with life-long depression/anxiety struggles and I've just recently joined that club as well but am getting help. I just started playing poker again after a long break and I think focusing on my game is actually helping...

      As for tilting, 2 things have helped me:

      1) Realize that once you've made your play, you have no control on what cards come up. So don't focus on the result, focus on did you make a good play with the information you had at the time. If you did, be happy with that. If you didn't, be happy that you gave yourself a learning opportunity. And since you have PT4, make sure you use it to review those hands :)

      2) I play in short 1 hour sessions with a break in between each one... If I have been playing well it is a short break, if I have been playing poorly, I take a longer break to make sure I have calmed down.

      I've marked your thread as one to follow - good luck and good skill development!
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      pokerTRACKER4, haha, well spotted :rolleyes:
    • david26551
      david26551
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Originally posted by Ramble
      Good Luck David,

      We have some similar stories and bankrolls, except I am focusing on STT SnG's...

      I have family members with life-long depression/anxiety struggles and I've just recently joined that club as well but am getting help. I just started playing poker again after a long break and I think focusing on my game is actually helping...

      As for tilting, 2 things have helped me:

      1) Realize that once you've made your play, you have no control on what cards come up. So don't focus on the result, focus on did you make a good play with the information you had at the time. If you did, be happy with that. If you didn't, be happy that you gave yourself a learning opportunity. And since you have PT4, make sure you use it to review those hands :)

      2) I play in short 1 hour sessions with a break in between each one... If I have been playing well it is a short break, if I have been playing poorly, I take a longer break to make sure I have calmed down.

      I've marked your thread as one to follow - good luck and good skill development!
      Thanks for the post, I think ill be following your advice, just played about 250 hands over the last hour, down about 100BB from a couple of bad beats, but feel ok about it, QQ all in against JJ got beat. Then KK all in against K8 got beat, so at least I got the money in with the best hand. Ill take a bit of a break now to refocus.
    • david26551
      david26551
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      So today kinda went from bad to worse, everytime I thought I was ahead with tptk they showed some ridiculous 2pair at showdown, I trapped AA with a set and got drawn out on the river, every time I got a high pair in preflop I got drawn out.
      Anyway, I hit my 500 hand target and decided to leave it there today, heres the graph (if I can get it to work...)



      I have a rough idea of what the C-all in adjustment stat means, so correct me if im wrong, but that's basically confirming I was running pretty bad today?

      Anyway, im not too unhappy with how I played. It wasn't perfect by any means, but I felt it wasn't too bad, and more importantly I kept my emotions out of it, I felt I was tilting slightly by the end but I managed to focus on just making the right decisions. *sigh* here's hoping I have better luck tomorrow.
    • david26551
      david26551
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      So I got up late today, played about 300 hands, about broke even, now im taking a short break, listening to unam's live coaching stream, very informative stuff! :D

      Picking some holes in my game this session, gonna post some of the evaluations in a minute. I tend to overthink things at the start of a session, and when im not getting many hands. Think im being bluffed when im not etc. So im going to quickly jot down some points to work on here.

      1. Play ABC poker. Don't attempt marginal plays, always try to have a hand.
      2. Cut down on C-bets, evaluate the flop instead of making it automatic.
      3. Try to put my opponents on a hand. Observe their position and bets more closely.

      will post my results for the day later on!
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67


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      So heres my results for day 2, better than yesterday for sure, but im not happy with how I played. Far too many silly plays when I was way behind. Need to work on tightening up my opening ranges preflop to make postflop a little easier. Tomorrow im going to make an effort to make sure im playing in position and with initiative the majority of the time.

      Mood wise, I struggled a bit with concentration today, probably why I made those silly plays, going to try and wake up early tomorrow, take the dog for a walk to wake up properly before playing.

      still, got my 500 hands in today and came out ahead! woo! celebration ice cream time I think....
    • david26551
      david26551
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Disruptive sleep cycle and poor health made me feel kind of terrible today, but I felt I was playing fairly well, and was having a good run of cards, until right to the end of the session.

      PokerStars - $0.10 NL - Holdem - 7 players
      Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

      CO: 191.3 BB (VPIP: 45.45, PFR: 0.00, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 35)
      BTN: 108.3 BB (VPIP: 22.22, PFR: 11.11, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 18)
      Hero (SB): 102.5 BB
      BB: 110.5 BB (VPIP: 20.34, PFR: 15.25, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 59)
      UTG: 213.6 BB (VPIP: 14.89, PFR: 10.64, 3Bet Preflop: 5.00, Hands: 47)
      UTG+1: 127.7 BB (VPIP: 13.43, PFR: 7.46, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 68)
      MP: 193.8 BB (VPIP: 19.15, PFR: 14.89, 3Bet Preflop: 13.33, Hands: 47)

      Hero posts SB 0.5 BB, BB posts BB 1 BB

      Pre Flop: (pot: 1.5 BB) Hero has A:spade: K:diamond:

      UTG raises to 2.8 BB, fold, fold, CO raises to 4.6 BB, fold, Hero raises to 18 BB, fold, fold, CO raises to 31.4 BB, Hero raises to 102.5 BB and is all-in, CO calls 71.1 BB

      Flop: (208.8 BB, 2 players) K:club: J:spade: 7:spade:

      Turn: (208.8 BB, 2 players) J:club:

      River: (208.8 BB, 2 players) 3:club:

      Hero shows A:spade: K:diamond: (Two Pair, Kings and Jacks) (Pre 7%, Flop 13%, Turn 5%)
      CO shows A:club: A:heart: (Two Pair, Aces and Jacks) (Pre 93%, Flop 87%, Turn 95%)
      CO wins 199.4 BB


      raise and a reraise, I knew I was beat but for some reason I screwed up. Was definitely tilting after that, so set tables to fold next BB and didn't lose anymore. Really feel disappointed in myself after that, was a great run up until that point. :(



      Still making a profit for the day, so I know I should feel happy, but im just really disappointed in my playing. Going to post a couple of hands on the evaluation forum and try to relax now.
    • sileekhunt
      sileekhunt
      Bronze
      Joined: 09.06.2010 Posts: 286
      Originally posted by david26551
      Disruptive sleep cycle and poor health made me feel kind of terrible today, but I felt I was playing fairly well, and was having a good run of cards, until right to the end of the session.

      PokerStars - $0.10 NL - Holdem - 7 players
      Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

      CO: 191.3 BB (VPIP: 45.45, PFR: 0.00, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 35)
      BTN: 108.3 BB (VPIP: 22.22, PFR: 11.11, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 18)
      Hero (SB): 102.5 BB
      BB: 110.5 BB (VPIP: 20.34, PFR: 15.25, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 59)
      UTG: 213.6 BB (VPIP: 14.89, PFR: 10.64, 3Bet Preflop: 5.00, Hands: 47)
      UTG+1: 127.7 BB (VPIP: 13.43, PFR: 7.46, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 68)
      MP: 193.8 BB (VPIP: 19.15, PFR: 14.89, 3Bet Preflop: 13.33, Hands: 47)

      Hero posts SB 0.5 BB, BB posts BB 1 BB

      Pre Flop: (pot: 1.5 BB) Hero has A:spade: K:diamond:

      UTG raises to 2.8 BB, fold, fold, CO raises to 4.6 BB, fold, Hero raises to 18 BB, fold, fold, CO raises to 31.4 BB, Hero raises to 102.5 BB and is all-in, CO calls 71.1 BB

      Flop: (208.8 BB, 2 players) K:club: J:spade: 7:spade:

      Turn: (208.8 BB, 2 players) J:club:

      River: (208.8 BB, 2 players) 3:club:

      Hero shows A:spade: K:diamond: (Two Pair, Kings and Jacks) (Pre 7%, Flop 13%, Turn 5%)
      CO shows A:club: A:heart: (Two Pair, Aces and Jacks) (Pre 93%, Flop 87%, Turn 95%)
      CO wins 199.4 BB


      raise and a reraise, I knew I was beat but for some reason I screwed up. Was definitely tilting after that, so set tables to fold next BB and didn't lose anymore. Really feel disappointed in myself after that, was a great run up until that point. :(



      Still making a profit for the day, so I know I should feel happy, but im just really disappointed in my playing. Going to post a couple of hands on the evaluation forum and try to relax now.
      Yeh it sucks after all the effort;

      I think in this spot that villain is a loose passive guy who suddenly wakes up super aggy...... should deffo set off some alarm bells. I would see a flop & try & spike TPTK & proceed with caution....
    • metza
      metza
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.01.2012 Posts: 2,220
      Originally posted by sileekhunt
      I think in this spot that villain is a loose passive guy who suddenly wakes up super aggy...... should deffo set off some alarm bells. I would see a flop & try & spike TPTK & proceed with caution....
      Calling only to hit a pair (that is not even good a large amount of the time) in a 5bet pot is definitely a bad play imo.

      Here I think Folding >>>> Shoving > Calling.

      In this spot vs guy who is 45/0 I would rarely expect to see him 5bet anything worse than KK.
    • sileekhunt
      sileekhunt
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      Joined: 09.06.2010 Posts: 286
      Originally posted by metza
      Originally posted by sileekhunt
      I think in this spot that villain is a loose passive guy who suddenly wakes up super aggy...... should deffo set off some alarm bells. I would see a flop & try & spike TPTK & proceed with caution....
      Calling only to hit a pair (that is not even good a large amount of the time) in a 5bet pot is definitely a bad play imo.

      Here I think Folding >>>> Shoving > Calling.

      In this spot vs guy who is 45/0 I would rarely expect to see him 5bet anything worse than KK.
      yeh prob right actually. didn't quite spot it was a 5-bet from this guy :D
    • david26551
      david26551
      Bronze
      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Just a quick update. Ive been ill the last couple of days and felt I wasn't in the right mindset to play, still, feeling a little better today and hope to get a session in. Ill be posting results later.
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67


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      Short session while I was feeling a little better, dodgy play, but good warmup for a proper session tomorrow hopefully, as usual gonna post a few hands on the evaluation forum now.
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Got back in the saddle today after being ill again yesterday, feeling a little better, and after a shaky start, had a good couple of sessions!



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      Started off with KK all in preflop, busted by aces. 2nd dip was set over set, I had 22, flopped a set, 4 players in the hand, slowplayed the flop before betting the turn, getting raised and getting it all in to discover he hit his set on the turn.

      So I was a little depressed at this point, but was trying not to think about it and simply play tight, smart poker, and lo, the poker gods smiled upon my plight and saw fit to offer me a triple up, courtesy of pocket aces, all in preflop against AK and 88. Getting back to even in 1 hand was a very good confidence booster and I felt good playing the next hour or so.

      I played pretty well today, and I made a nice profit, so im happy for once :D
      Fingers crossed for tomorrow!
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67
      Hey guys, so I had another rough few days that I didn't play, but got up early today, went outside for a walk, then came back determined to play well. Got about 600 hands in and broke even, and tbh I was lucky I did that well, played pretty much like crap, see the hand evaluations forum for some highlights lol.

      Really struggling with my mood lately, but im disappointed in myself everyday I don't play, and im pretty disappointed when I play bad too. Gonna take a break, try to relax and maybe have another session later.
    • david26551
      david26551
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      Joined: 28.09.2013 Posts: 67


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      had a second session, came out with a decent profit, even though I got pretty damn lucky. The weird bit around 700hands in was me drawing out in a set over set situation. Makes me feel good coming out of the day with a profit, even though I don't think I really deserved it :/

      Still count your blessings and all that, I have to keep telling myself ill never be the best player in the world, helps me from beating myself up over mistakes.

      So onto my song of the day! (im in a random mood)

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcLfMob8mC8
      (metal fans only)

      ps. yeah im a forum noob and don't know how to get the video on this page :(
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