I want diamond status because:

I neeeeeeeeeed it. I really really really really really neeeed it.

Ok, lets be honest. I AM THE CHOSEN ONE! More than 1000 years, humanity have waited this moment... More than 1000 poker rooms have opened with one reason - to wait when THE CHOSEN ONE comes in their poker room... More than 1000 players have been banned because, they lied, that they are THE CHOSEN ONES... And here it is... The big true... I AM THE CHOSEN ONE! All of the Poker gods, have putted their minds together, to create me! And here I am. You just can't deny it.

If you wont give me diamond status, I will tell it to my mother!

And yes... She will hurt you!

And there is even song, which explains why exactly I am that one, who need Diamond status:
(Song by Michael Jackson)
She always takes it with a flush or stright
'Cause all she does is throw all-in to me
I've spent a lifetime
Looking for some royal flush
Don't try to understand me
Just simply do the
Things I say
Diamond is a feeling
Give it when I want it
'Cause I'm on fire
Quench my desire
Give it when I want it
Talk to me pokerstrategy
Give in to me
Give in to me
You always knew just how to make me fold
And never did I ask you questions why
It seems you get your chips from hurting me
Don't try to understand me
Because your bluff just isn't enough
Diamond is a feeling
Quench my desire
Give it when I want it
Takin' me higher
Diamond is a power
I just wanna win it
Give in to me
Give in to me
She and her friends
Were laughing at me in tournament
But it's okay
And it's okay
You wont be laughing girl
When I will be Diamond
I'll be okay
And I'll, I'll win all
Gotta, the peace of chips yeah
Don't try to win me
Because your bluff
Just aren't enough
Diamond is a feeling
Quench my desire
Give it when I want it
Takin' me higher
Talk to me pokerstrategy
Diamond is a feeling
Give in to me
Give in to me
Give in to me
Diamond is a feeling
I just wanna win it
Quench my desire
Takin' me higher
Tell it to the jury
Satisfy the feeling
Give in to me
Give in to me
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
Loose it
Give it to me faster
Talk to me pokerstrategy
Quench my desire
I don't like a silver
Talk to me pokerstrategy
Give in to me
Give in to me faster
Give in to me
Give in to me
Give in to me
Diamond is a power
Give in to me
Give in to me
Give in to me
Give in to me
'Cause I'm THE CHOSEN ONE
Talk to me pokerstrategy
Quench my desire
Give it to me faaaaasteeer

Now You have to understand - I deserve Diamond status!