Broken glass, dustpan and my nerves

    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520
      Last month ended nicely(NL25 fr round 7bb/100). So starting july I had big hopes, plans and expectations.
      First two days of july went round 120$ under EV. Third, fourth, fifth and sixth it was already round 300$ under EV. Seventh and eight were breakeven.

      So I concentrated on grinding, hell, what else is one to do when the bs variance kicks in. Left my studying part aside and play more.
      So this morning I had a short session round 1,5k hands. Breakeven again. And again million set ups, sick hands, ofc lost every flip and didn`t get a dime with nuts hands. Ok I say, lets take a break, make lunch, watch 30 rock, chill and than play again.

      So... After chilling, I start my session. As soon as I started, lost one flip, got my aces cracked twice and some more sick hands in bout 50 hands. I just lost it! I started shoving with TPTK, 3b every hand for like 3min. I couldn`t recognize myself. When I came to myself I immediately turned off everything. I was so pissed I hit the table as hard as I could and glass fell off the table and broke. I picked it up with the dustpan and then smashed the dustpan. I was really out of control and had a feeling that if those idiot player were beside me in real life I probably couldn`t resist smashing their faces beyond recognition.

      I know it is a rookie mistake and I didn`t tilt for a very long time which I am very proud of cuz with poker I learned to recognize myself and know my personality and tendencies.

      That is why I am writing this. What could this mean? Maybe too much pressure subconsciously???
      I knooooow I am better than those retards, I know I am beating them 24/7 anyplace anytime, why do I then must loose 9 days in a month, battling their incompetence which is getting rewarded and donating their bad play. Just bullshit.

      And fckn stars! That Poker Mindset book is out of stock like for 4 month already. Why the F*** do I even create rake if I cant buy a friggin book! I wrote to them a month ago but no answer (I know that book costs like 20$ but I ain`t buying it out of principle!!!)
  • 18 replies
    • crowes
      crowes
      Bronze
      Joined: 19.09.2009 Posts: 78
      Yeah....that s***ts happeneds . Just go to nl2 and do wild for some time, that help me every time...and in your case probably save u another table =)
    • Berzerger
      Berzerger
      Bronze
      Joined: 24.03.2008 Posts: 910
      Have someone else watch you play. You'll be too embarrassed to make stupid mistakes, thereby enforcing self-control. Also, never play with the mindset that you "deserve" to win, that's a highway to tilt. But first relax and do something fun to get poker out of your head.
    • saywhat
      saywhat
      Bronze
      Joined: 25.11.2008 Posts: 253
      I have been there before, i still punch the table every now and then, but it is padded where i hit it. I decided to switch to MTT's, so when that did happen i only lost my buy-in, which is only $3.

      That's i learned how to cope with the bad beats.

      Good luck at the tables next time you play, and that was some good advice, never think that you should win the hand, it is a recipe for disaster.
    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520


      This is just fckn bs!!!! I swear to god I h8 this fckn game... This is turning out to be one of the sickest months of my life... It is just a complete bullshit! Fckn stars, poker, stupid ppl playing poker and everything together I hope they burn in hell fckn pieces of shit!!!!

      "yeaaahhh it could be worse" ... yeah but it could be better... every fckn time I set up a goal and points I have to achieve everything gets fcked up...

      buuuuuulllshiiiiittttt... and I broke my keyboard... luckily I can afford my self a new one with this months poker earnings ... oh wait no I cant cuz some fucktards make it their hobby sucking out on ppl ...

      I just h8 the air surronding me now..
    • ZhiCheng
      ZhiCheng
      Bronze
      Joined: 04.10.2008 Posts: 2,294


      .... just saying

      gl;)
    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520
      I know!!! But its out of stock on stars... :s_frown:
    • Atoks
      Atoks
      Bronze
      Joined: 01.06.2008 Posts: 1,354
      U make several mistakes in ur poker "mindset." Cool off, go over what u wrote a few more times and figure em out. If u can't u either aren't cut out to be a poker player or u just CBA to put in the effort. I'll let u decide which is worse.

      I will say though that u remind me a bit of myself in some ways. I only broke one little magnet however but mentally I was raving about how certain days went poker-wise. Takes a lot to get over these issues ...
    • anthonygazar
      anthonygazar
      Bronze
      Joined: 29.12.2008 Posts: 5,607
      ah les sass!
      que des fish toutes façon les anglais!!! :D
    • Atoks
      Atoks
      Bronze
      Joined: 01.06.2008 Posts: 1,354
      Originally posted by anthonygazar
      ah les sass!
      que des fish toutes façon les anglais!!! :D
      Someone (finally) learned how to use a proxy server?
    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520
      He is drunk so he trols the poker forum (getalife.com or .fr) :f_p:
    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520
      Hi again! Don`t wanna open another thread.

      It is just silly this month. I didn`t have tilt outbursts anymore, but by now I am just feeling really really sad. It is unbelievable how many setups and coolers I suffer. At this point I know I will lose 85% of hands regardless of their strenght. It is than hard for me to play my A game, but I am giving it my best. And as hard I try to rise my spirits up and gain my confidece there comes another blow as soon as I start feeling comfertable.

      So here is the graph...

    • Alficor1
      Alficor1
      Bronze
      Joined: 16.06.2010 Posts: 7,291
      I think you should take a break for like two weeks. I did the same once when i lost my entire roll in a week, and it really helped me. ;) If you feel like ur gonna lose every hand you play, you shouldnt play at all.
    • Heffron89
      Heffron89
      Bronze
      Joined: 23.01.2009 Posts: 813
      I can give u poker mindset book pm me! :)
    • MatejM47
      MatejM47
      Black
      Joined: 21.01.2010 Posts: 1,193
      Imo you have to control you're tilting. Everybody has bad days like that. When ever you got a hand they just fold, when your bluffing they keep calling you. You lose with aces 3 times in a row, but shit like that happens a lot and if you really have to control your tilt issues. You generally lose more from tilting then from those few bad beats.

      The fact is that everybody tilts. Nobody plays the same way when they're winning as when they are losing. But good players learn to control it. When you see yourself tilting just take a break. Maybe you need a week, whereas somebody only needs 5minutes.
    • TetraQuark
      TetraQuark
      Bronze
      Joined: 21.05.2008 Posts: 1,520
      Hi again!

      It really doesn`t affect me in that way... Cuz I am down like 20bi this month... And pure tilt took away like 3-4...

      I keep playing... Have a nice start... Like earlier... Get up like stack or two... Not that it matters... And than the horror begins...

      Hand converted with online PokerStrategy.com hand converter:

      Play hand

      $0.1/$0.25 No-Limit Hold'em (6 handed)

      Known players:
      CO:
      $25.00
      BU:
      $47.18
      SB:
      $25.00
      BB (Hero):
      $27.38
      MP2:
      $28.77
      MP3:
      $10.00


      Preflop: Hero is BB with K, K.
      MP2 raises to $0.90, 4 folds, Hero raises to $2.75, MP2 calls $1.85.

      Flop: ($5.6) 8, 6, T (2 players)
      Hero bets $4.00, MP2 calls $4.00.

      Turn: ($13.6) 4 (2 players)
      Hero bets $10.00, MP2 raises to $22.02(All-In), Hero calls $10.63.

      River: ($56.25) 8 (2 players)


      Final Pot: $56.25.
      Results follow:

      Hero shows two pairs, kings and eights(K K).
      MP2 shows two pairs, aces and eights(A A).

      MP2 wins with two pairs, aces and eights(A A).

      Like suddenly everybody on friggin NL25 slowplays aces! And hey I don`t blame anybody... but why the hell does the set up of bord make me go ai!?!? I mean whose ass do I have to kiss to get a break around here.
      ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------



      But hey what am I to expect when I am loosing to three out whole goddamn month!

      Hand converted with online PokerStrategy.com hand converter:

      Play hand

      $0.1/$0.25 No-Limit Hold'em (8 handed)

      Known players:
      BB:
      $25.00
      UTG2:
      $27.59
      MP1:
      $25.00
      MP2 (Hero):
      $28.18
      MP3:
      $7.70
      CO:
      $25.50
      BU:
      $13.65
      SB:
      $24.75


      Preflop: Hero is MP2 with A, K.
      UTG2 calls $0.25, MP1 folds, Hero raises to $1.25, 2 folds, BU calls $1.25, 3 folds, 2 folds, UTG2 folds.

      Flop: ($3.1) J, 4, 2 (2 players)
      Hero bets $1.50, BU calls $1.50.

      Turn: ($6.1) K (2 players)
      Hero bets $4.00, BU raises to $10.90(All-In), Hero calls $6.90.

      River: ($27.9) J (2 players)


      Final Pot: $27.9.
      Results follow:

      Hero shows two pairs, kings and jacks(A K).
      BU shows three of a kind, jacks(A J).

      BU wins with three of a kind, jacks(A J).
      ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


      But this last one was brilliant! I mean just brilliant!

      Hand converted with online PokerStrategy.com hand converter:

      Play hand

      $0.1/$0.25 No-Limit Hold'em (7 handed)

      Known players:
      MP2:
      $16.79
      MP3:
      $25.00
      CO:
      $25.91
      BU:
      $25.00
      SB (Hero):
      $52.94
      BB:
      $25.57
      MP1:
      $24.65


      Preflop: Hero is SB with 2, 2.
      3 folds, CO calls $0.25, BU folds, Hero calls $0.15, BB checks.

      Flop: ($0.75) 4, 3, J (3 players)
      Hero checks, BB checks, CO checks.

      Turn: ($0.75) 3 (3 players)
      Hero checks, BB checks, CO checks.

      River: ($0.75) 2 (3 players)
      Hero bets $1.00, BB folds, CO raises to $2.50, Hero raises to $8.50, CO raises to $18.00, Hero raises to $53.69, CO calls $7.66.

      Final Pot: $79.1.
      Results follow:

      Hero shows a full-house, twos full of threes(2 2).
      CO shows four of a kind, threes(3 3).

      CO wins with four of a kind, threes(3 3).


      I mean hell... I picked these just random. Plenty more where those came from... And this is just todays session. It won`t go away if I stopped playing. Cuz I had a day or two break came back and it is just the same shit!
    • Berzerger
      Berzerger
      Bronze
      Joined: 24.03.2008 Posts: 910
      I don't know if the coaches would approve of what I'm about to advise, but have a back-up game. For me, it's SnG, and whenever I feel like lady Luck is having some pesky sadistic fun at my expense in ring games, I play some STTs to have a change of scenery. It's helpful to play a game with different dynamics for variation, and it gives you an impression of a fresh start. Of course every hand is a fresh start, but psychologically it helps you settle into that mindset with more ease than just continuously telling yourself that the odds are always the same.
    • Alficor1
      Alficor1
      Bronze
      Joined: 16.06.2010 Posts: 7,291
      The same happened to me today:

      Stage #C96681550: Holdem No Limit $0.02 - 2010-07-19 07:50:23 (ET)
      Table: UMAR AVE (Real Money) Seat #6 is the dealer
      Seat 6 - BACKWAY ($1.79 in chips)
      Seat 1 - 5150SKILLS ($2.68 in chips)
      Seat 2 - BELLAENZO ($2 in chips)
      Seat 3 - HARLECAT ($1.94 in chips)
      Seat 4 - ALFICOR ($3.22 in chips)
      Seat 5 - JOHN6ONE9 ($1.83 in chips)
      5150SKILLS - Posts small blind $0.01
      HARLECAT - Posts big blind $0.02
      *** POCKET CARDS ***
      Dealt to ALFICOR [8c 8s]
      ALFICOR - Raises $0.06 to $0.06
      JOHN6ONE9 - Folds
      BACKWAY - Calls $0.06
      5150SKILLS - Calls $0.05
      HARLECAT - Folds
      *** FLOP *** [4s 6h Jd]
      5150SKILLS - Checks
      ALFICOR - Bets $0.10
      BACKWAY - Calls $0.10
      5150SKILLS - Calls $0.10
      *** TURN *** [4s 6h Jd] [6d]
      5150SKILLS - Checks
      ALFICOR - Checks
      BACKWAY - Bets $0.08
      5150SKILLS - Calls $0.08
      ALFICOR - Calls $0.08
      *** RIVER *** [4s 6h Jd 6d] [8h]
      5150SKILLS - Checks
      ALFICOR - Bets $0.18
      BACKWAY - Calls $0.18
      5150SKILLS - Raises $1.46 to $1.46
      ALFICOR - All-In(Raise) $2.80 to $2.98
      BACKWAY - Folds
      5150SKILLS - All-In $0.98
      ALFICOR - returned ($0.54) : not called
      *** SHOW DOWN ***
      ALFICOR - Shows [8c 8s] (Full house, eights full of sixes)
      5150SKILLS - Shows [6c 6s] (Four of a kind, sixes)
      5150SKILLS Collects $5.51 from main pot
      *** SUMMARY ***
      Total Pot($5.80) | Rake ($0.29)
      Board [4s 6h Jd 6d 8h]
      Seat 1: 5150SKILLS (small blind) won Total ($5.51) All-In HI:( $5.51) with Four of a kind, sixes [6c 6s - P6,B6,B6,P6,BJ]
      Seat 3: HARLECAT (big blind) Folded on the POCKET CARDS
      Seat 4: ALFICOR HI:lost with Full house, eights full of sixes [8c 8s - P8,B8,P8,B6,B6]
      Seat 5: JOHN6ONE9 Folded on the POCKET CARDS
      Seat 6: BACKWAY (dealer) Folded on the RIVER

      If it makes you feel better, you're not alone... Nothing's worse than being drawing dead and getting there. I have taken some really bad beats on AP in past two days.
    • w34z3l
      w34z3l
      Coach
      Coach
      Joined: 03.08.2009 Posts: 13,295
      Hey, Gregor, it's made me feel a little better reading this post. I am a winning player over hundreds of thousands of hands and have hit probably the worst swing of my poker existence.

      Currently I am 16bi below AI expected value (BSS), and I have a strong feeling the state of my true expected value is a LOT worse.

      So many runner-runner straights, rivering sets/quads, set over set coolers, my graph is ridiculous.

      Well, I got pretty mad like you. Except I didn't smash anything. I just stuck my entire bankroll on the roulette wheel.

      Fortunately I was lucky. For now the downswing has stopped, but I'm still suffering an unreal amount of bad beats, just not so many coolers. Any time I win a buyin I'm usually bad-beat out of it pretty quickly. My graph is horizontal (break-even) while AI-EV line slowly goes up.

      Worst 25k hands of my life. Perhaps I'll post the graph....but I'm going to play more hands first, it's turning into something truly spectacular.

      w34z3l