how i made the day my bitch

    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      Hi there

      My name is Tobias i am 30 years old and this is my 100th try to start a blog.

      I recently worked with Primoz (Schnitzelfish) on my motivation and productivity problems and this should become one tool to keep me on track.

      I will blog about the problems i will go through and the ones i ve already overcome, my journey from a total bjj novice to a black belt and of course my poker adventures.
      The purpose of this blog is to have a diary for me and maybe i can help some people with my experience how are facing simular problems or the other way around.

      The first problem i had to overcome was my lazyness and my unproductivity.
      I ve been laying in bed countless times, saying to myself tomorrow you will try harder and you will get x and y done, but of course this didnt work out.
      I had motivations highs were I just gathered informations i thought i need but never really read them or applied them.
      Beeing stuck in this rut for several years i become so sick of it, that i reached out for help.
      In Primoz introduction post and in his skyrocket your production post he wrote a lot of problems i found myself stuck with.
      So i thought this is my guy and i will give it a shot. I was working with him now for 4 month and was part of the mym group and i made a lot of progress.
      The first month was basicly the stuff he is teaching in his videos but I just needed somone who kicks me in the butt to do stuff at this time and I would propably never watched them. We needed to schedule the sessions in the afternoons to make sure i was awake and i was poorly prepared.
      I was waiting for him to say the magic words to make my life better but unfortnatly there isnt anything like this, without me working on myself. But without realizing it, I was progressing.
      The next month i had fixed my sleeping schedule because we realized that me waking up early is key for me to a succesful day.
      I was way better prepared for our sessions which meant we found solutions much easier and my momentum was growing and growing.
      Unfortunately i had lost it several times but despite the beginning I was able to build it up on my own again as i got better and better to deal with setbacks and see them as a learning experience.
      Many of my problems seems unintelligible for the normal productiv person but for me they were keeping my life back.
      Now this month i got nobody on my team but i feel I am well prepared to keep my motivation and even to continue to work harder on myself to become a better Tobi.

      The most important tool for me to keep on track is propably my morning routine at the moment.
      After waking up I used to go to my office and smoke one cigarette while I was mindless surfing, this could go on for several hours till i was hungry that i get my "breakfast" and showering.
      Now I wake up still got to smoke my cigarette but go jogging after it, then have breakfast, go showering and just go to the pc when i need to. I still end up that i surf a little too much but the momentum i built up with me running while listen to music or an audio book is keeping me to do my next task.

      I want to concentrate this week on preparing and planing my days better. I ve already make a rough plan but I want it a little more detailed. I think the best time to do this is before i go to bed.

      So long
  • 76 replies
    • zachrina
      zachrina
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.12.2012 Posts: 934
      Best of luck with life and poker my friend.

      I look forward to seeing your progression.

      :f_thumbsup:
    • Shuttled
      Shuttled
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      Joined: 15.09.2007 Posts: 149
      Good luck, I'll follow your post
    • Schnitzelfisch
      Schnitzelfisch
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      Joined: 08.11.2008 Posts: 4,952
      How can you not laugh out loud when you read this blog title :D ?
    • hvard92
      hvard92
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      Joined: 15.02.2012 Posts: 789
      How can you not laugh out loud when you read this blog title :D ?


      xD
    • gadget51
      gadget51
      Bronze
      Joined: 23.06.2008 Posts: 5,622
      Hi Tobias and welcome to blogs!

      Good idea to set those goals out early but take it from an ex-smoking professional, drop the cigarettes as soon as you can. It changed my life a huge amount.

      Anyway, have fun!

      Mal.
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      thx @ all for reading welcoming commenting
      How did you quit smoking? Did you use any gadgets helping you?

      Since this is a poker forum i should talk a little more about my goals in poker.
      I am currently living from live poker trying to make a comeback in the online world in nl hu. currently i am playing nl 50 wiht some nl 100 tables mixed in.
      I really enjoy it, at least most of the time and looking forward to improve my game and climb in stakes and hopfully come high enough i will be able to play live only for fun one day.
      I am playing for a living till 2 years now and despite i still enjoy live poker there is a lot which is annoying me. For example the set hours. I want to be able to grind if i feel
      i am on my best at this day and not because the casino is open. If I am 5 minutes late i can wait for 2 hours to get a seat which is very annoying. There is no real possibility to table select.
      Also it just sounds better sitting at home in your boxers then spending your nights in the casino in your suit. I am aware how much tougher online is compared to live but i am
      confident i can make my way there also.

      Helping me a lot on my journey is my vision statement. I strongly believe everyone who wants to be succesful in his choosen area should have one.
      Also it is mentioned as one of the first steps in every book/podcast/video i have read about productivity and was the first step in primoz privat coaching and the mym course.

      I sat down and just wrote down what seems to be important for me at the moment. What i want to achieve in poker, sport and my life in general. After i had some points,
      i asked myself why i want to achieve those things. Some were easy to answer some were hard. For example just to make money isnt a very good reason if you have no plan how to use the money.
      On the other hand if you have a goal how to spend your earned $$$ it can be very powerful and motivating.
      I read through my vision statement every morning and i worked in some tiny habits in my normal day to make sure I visualize them regualr.
      For example, one of my poker goals is to have every 3 month a "businuiss trip" for about a week to a different town with a casino. When i visualize it i picture myself planning my trip, arriving at the airport, the hotel etc,
      I love to travel and just visualizing this, is getting me excited and motivated to do the necessary steps.
      So after i found a goal which is motivating me, I break it down into smaller steps, those steps get broken down into even smaller steps till i can create small action steps out of it.
      For my picked example this isnt really necessary because it dont have this many steps but if you have a bigger goal like beeing the first man on the moon you had to invent a timemachine first which i am sure just this alone has
      a lot of steps. you have to get through astronaut training and come to the nasa (for the conspiracy fans you have to become an actor) etc. So you see as bigger your goal as more breakdowns are needed.
      A good goal should be very specific, measurable, attainible, time bount and for me it has to make me feel excited.

      After a while I noticed some of my goals just didnt get me this excited anymore. So i just wrote a new vision statement. Many goals still remained the same, some were just phrased a little differnt and some were dropped and new ones were
      added. Just by writting them down i got a lot of motivation again. And almost like a dog who cant wait to go out and is scratching the door I couldnt wait either to get some steps done.
      So for me its a way to create a motivation high and get done a lot. I dont know if this will work everytime but i will test it when my vision statement will fail me again.

      So long
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      last week didnt went as good as i planned or hoped. i got a good start but as the week prgroessed i got lazier and lazier.
      also my weekly goal to plan and prepare my days better failed.
      I managed to plan them better but i didnt prepare them. Main reason therfore is I was already laying in bed and just was to lazy to stand up again. So I will have to overdo this again.
      I will work out a evening routine which makes sure I do all necessary steps.
      Not sure how it will look like but I got some ideas and hopfully I will have one which works well for me in the next weeks.

      A good thing this week was, that I was playing more poker again and also got some theory done.
      Me and hu are still not friends but I will get there. I feel I ran very bad in addition to my many mistakes I made.
      One very important thing is that I am not quitting opponents at all or way to late. So i basicly threw away one of the biggest upsides of hu poker the table selection.
      I dont have this problem live, if i dont feel the table is worth playing i quit, but online I seem
      to have a harder time.
      For this week my goal will be to test the ideas for creating a good evening routine and for poker to quiet opponents.

      So long
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      The last couple of weeks had been a mixed bag.
      I had some very good days but then a stretch of very bad days.
      These were propapbly triggered by me cutting myself too much slack. I didnt do the mindfulness regular anymore, i slipped a lot on my spreadsheet casuing my days were less organized and i wasnt sure what to do this day and i broke with my morning set up.
      I picked up a game and played it excessiv was the last trigger to put me almost right back where i started.
      These were only 5 days to sabotage a couple of month hard work and a descent amount of money I invested in myself.
      Atm I work with 2 people i met on the mym course together. We meet a couple of times a week,
      redoing the course and talking about our productivity problems etc, which for me is very helpful and was propably one part of the reasons I didnt fall completly off.

      I have reread Stevens Pressfields book „Turn Pro“ and I had to realize, I have to find solutions for some problems again.
      According to him the amatuer is creating addictions to procrastinate. These addictions dont have to be drugs, they can be in all forms of resistance to keep you from doing the work, like facebook, video games or always going out.
      I made a list which things I believe are my addictions.

      -Sleep
      I tend to sleep too much or too less. Both keeping me from being on my best. After a couple of month with mostly very good sleep I really realized how important it is and I need to create my day to make sure I sleep well.

      -Facebook/mindless browsing

      Its got a lot better but still I feel I spend too much time wasting on the internet. I canceled my facebook for about a month a couple of weeks ago and there I realized how often I open it because I just saw the login screen and not the last holiday pictures etc. or the other crap I waste my time with.
      This can be solved with a add on for my browser or maybe a second user profile were its blocked
      or I just cancel it for good.


      -Gathering information without using them

      I tend to search the web about a new topic I am interested in. Bookmark 20 sites, download all the free stuff and look at amazon for books. But I rarly use the information because after I have all this I feel overwhelmed and dont know where to start.
      Atm I came up with 2 solutions.

      a) I limit myself to 3 information sources maybe just 2 and go then from there

      b) I keep it as it happens but i create an action step out of every soure so its ordered and I dont feel overwhelmed

      I favor solution a atm because its easier and less work and I dont see much benefit in b) other then I dont have to stop myself. Also with the following problem i would propably benefit from limiting myself.


      -Finding new projects without finishing others.

      It doesnt come up this often but it still comes up often enough. Atm its in minor „projects“ like finishing a book and starting a new one before. But I dont like this habit, because it will propably show up on real projects also,
      According to Pressfield resistance is at its strongest right before you end and you need to be aware of this. So keeping this in mind will hopfully help. And actually finishing minor projects like closing a book knowing I have read it all is giving me a feeling of victory so succesfully ending
      a big project will propably feel very good.
      Despite this, I think I have to be really honest if the effort I put into it is worth the gain. If not it would be stupid to continue as long as I dont abort it for the wrong reasons.

      -Gaming

      Since I can remember I really liked video games. I was hooked when I had my first lcd game and nver stopped ever since.
      I know how counter productive it is and how I excessive I play if there is a new game I enjoy or looking forward to doing nothing else for a couple of days. After that I am most of the time done with it and continue. This might cost me all my momentum build up till then.
      I dont think I will be able to get a new game and just play for 2 hours and be productive before that its more like all or nothing. This leaves me with

      a) stop it for good

      b) dont overthink this, there arent coming games this often were I become a nerd for so long but then there come games like diablo 3 I have put in about 1k hours

      c)arrange it with yourself that some days after these games are like holiday and you can play without having a bad conscience

      Here I am very undecided. For productivity reasons its without discussion a). But on the other hand I am doing all this self development stuff also for creating more time for things I enjoy and this is one. Which also means sacrifice some old habits...




      So long
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      This was one of the most productives weeks I had this year.
      I kept up with all my habits, I read a lot, learned a lot of theory and played a fair amount of hands.
      I didn’t went to training this week which is bad and I have to work on this but I changed my sleep schedule and was waking up between 5-6 and started to get tired and had no energy after 16.
      This might be because its new for me to wake up this early and I was doing a lot till then. Will see if this continues.

      So long
    • ursusmm
      ursusmm
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      Joined: 20.08.2008 Posts: 5,871
      As promised: :heart:
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      I am looking forward to 2014 and I think it will be a great year. I feel I have come a long way since the last half year and I am really looking forward to see what 2014 got in store for me.

      Here are my goals for 2014

      -non smoker

      -starting investing/saving

      -meditation

      -bjj blue blet

      -no excuses attitude

      -52 non fictional books

      -beating nl 400

      -networking

      I will have my focus on stop smoking, beating nl 400 and mediation at first because these are goals I feel are mandatory or at least make other goals easier to achieve.

      Non smoker: Quitting will save me money i can use to invest,save buy books go to seminars etc. It will allow me to perform better in training and also it will spare me a lot of nagging from my girlfriend. Its nothing you give up its something you gain.
      I got the book form Allen Carr which helped me to stop smoking once before. Also I will meditate, do push ups, read and cook if I feel the need to smoke gets really strong to get my mind of it.
      Also if some ex smoker reads this I would be thankful for any tips.

      meditation I am doing some meditation already but I need to do it more regular since there are always 2 or 3 days a week I dont take the time to do it.
      I really enjoy it and I want to get "better" at it. I want to be able to concentrate and stoping my mind from wandering around. It helps me against tilting or beeing angry after a bad session. Its a good tool do train my self discipline muscle.

      beating nl 400 Its a stepping stone to the stakes I want to reach.
      I have to sit down and do more theory and the grind. Networking with other players will help me get there faster. Earning money is necessary to the other goals.


      See you in 2014

      so long
    • acceleration123
      acceleration123
      Gold
      Joined: 11.12.2010 Posts: 5,311
      subbed :)
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      Originally posted by acceleration123
      subbed :)
      thx a lot feels good to have a reader^^.

      the year started very slow propably because I was on more or less on a total break between christmas and new year and only kept up with some habits and for me the hardest part is to start.

      Today andd yesterday I got a little down and I feel my momentum train is picking up pace again.

      The book I am reading atm is "meditation for beginners" from Jack Kornfield. It is very short and more about the cd which comes with it. I like it so far and recmned it for every one who is interested in starting meditation.

      Next week will be David Allens "getting things done".

      So long
    • zachrina
      zachrina
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.12.2012 Posts: 934
      I'm interested in meditation so will check it out. Good luck.

      Check out The power of now by Eckhart Tolle also interesting.
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      Originally posted by zachrina
      I'm interested in meditation so will check it out. Good luck.

      Check out The power of now by Eckhart Tolle also interesting.
      also to you good sir.

      the power of now i ve already read and its a very good book imo and one of the reasons i picked up meditation in the first place.
      Did you read any of his other books?


      I had a couple of bad days the last week and now I am really struggling with everything. Actually struggling would still be good and totally failing at everything is more accurate.

      My motivation is on a aboslut low point and I would like to sleep all day. I am there were I started before I picked up all the productivity stuff.
      I am not 100% sure how I got here again but I dont like it.

      But crying about it will not get me were I want to be so time to man up and power through and concentrate on the mandetory things like good sleep, diet, meditation etc. and get the positive snowball effect going again.

      Also the quiet smoking plan is still in motion and on februar 1st I am a non smoker.
      Off to doing some work now

      So long
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      since my last post was more how I failed and bitched about it this one will be more about how I recovered.

      After I wrote the last post I already felt a little better and realized how important and helpful is for me to write my thoughts down and get them out of my head this way. So I will create a habit it to write one sentence every time I lay down in bed. After doing this for some time it will be easier to write more detailed stuff.

      I had a session with Primoz and we come to the conclusion every time I am lacking with my spreadsheet things start snowballing and I start to get sloppy with my other tasks till I end up in a situation like last week. To make sure I have at least look at it I made it my startsite. If I at least look at it several times a day I wont be able to ignore it all the time.

      I had to realize my drinking and partying is keeping me from reaching my goals and throwing me back. Since I tend to be a little more on the depressiv side this one can really throw me on my back.
      So I decided to take a break from this and dont drink till my birthday which will be in july.
      This will get hard for me I guess but we will see.

      Also I am planning to visit thailand again this year for 2-3 month and live in a grindhouse.
      I ve already talked to a guy who runs 3 houses in chiang mai and he may have a spot for me.

      I hope I find my passion for poker this way again. I am hoping beeing surrounded by grinders and be able to talk poker all the time will be very motivating and awsome for my game.
      Since many of my friends stopped playing I havent really found new poker friends and I am really looking forward to it since I really like the country also. Training there will be awsome, too.

      Last weekend I attendet a seminar about mentaltraining. It was cool but a little weired since some things the speaker taught or said to us were really strange.
      Its a little hard to describe but some techniques were really awsome and I am looking forward to add them to my toolbox.

      So long
    • aikira
      aikira
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.08.2006 Posts: 918
      today i am attending a webinar from James Clear about habit and I am really looking forward to it.

      You can check his site at http://jamesclear.com/ he got a newsletter where he talks about habits etc which is most of the very interesting and if you interested in this kind of stuff,
      I recomned you signing up.

      As far as reading goes I fall behind a little but trying to catch up. But I starting to question my goal with 1 book a week since in some there are many actionsteps and things to apply which is very hard to accomplish in a week.

      Atm I am reading Jared Tendlers Mentals Game Vol 1 which is an excellente book. After this I will continue with vol 2.

      Also 3 more days with smokes.

      The beginning of Februar will be hard

      So long
    • zachrina
      zachrina
      Bronze
      Joined: 05.12.2012 Posts: 934
      Originally posted by aikira
      Originally posted by zachrina
      I'm interested in meditation so will check it out. Good luck.

      Check out The power of now by Eckhart Tolle also interesting.
      also to you good sir.

      the power of now i ve already read and its a very good book imo and one of the reasons i picked up meditation in the first place.
      Did you read any of his other books?


      I had a couple of bad days the last week and now I am really struggling with everything. Actually struggling would still be good and totally failing at everything is more accurate.

      My motivation is on a aboslut low point and I would like to sleep all day. I am there were I started before I picked up all the productivity stuff.
      I am not 100% sure how I got here again but I dont like it.

      But crying about it will not get me were I want to be so time to man up and power through and concentrate on the mandetory things like good sleep, diet, meditation etc. and get the positive snowball effect going again.

      Also the quiet smoking plan is still in motion and on februar 1st I am a non smoker.
      Off to doing some work now

      So long
      I haven't read anything else yet but just got into meditation and stuff too. I also stopped smoking 3 years ago and now hate it. A good decision.

      I went to a meditation group the other day and they recommended John Kabat Zin's "wherever you go there you are" which I also have on audio book so looking forward to that.

      Good luck with everything buddy. Get involved with some of the other guys on here, there's some good people. All very normal with real problems of their own I'm sure.
    • Schnitzelfisch
      Schnitzelfisch
      Bronze
      Joined: 08.11.2008 Posts: 4,952
      The most important lesson here is that if you just keep your system running (in your case, spreadsheet) and are aware of it, you'll be able to get a ton more done than otherwise because you'll actually be in touch with what you want to do, instead of wandering around randomly and doing a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

      @Zahrina I've also heard of that book on meditation, heard it was amazing. So it's definitely worth checking out!