Whining & cursing

    • dember
      dember
      Bronze
      Joined: 17.04.2009 Posts: 158
      I am on tilt. I am not angry. It's more like apathy. What I win (win? are you fucking kidding me? I am working for it!) in SH FLHE I lose in 1 table SnGs. The past two days were terrible, broke my own rules and played a lot of SnGs 20% of my hard-earned bankroll is gone without making the slightest effort. It's not just a downswing, or that I had some bad luck, but I play terribly in SnGs. It's more disciplinary and emotional problem than actual knowledge. First, I tell myself what to do, I anticipate situations, I tell myself to fold AK when somebody went AI to my raise, I tell myself to fold my overpair in a draw-heavy flop - but I DON'T DO IT!!!!!!! I mean what the fuck is this? Who is talking and who the fuck is acting? What the fuck is going in my head? WHY THE FUCK I DON'T LISTEN TO MYSELF? GODDAMN IT!
      1. Why do I keep playing SnGs if I am a losing player in it? It does not matter whether it is because of lack of discipline or knowledge - I simply lose. And I lose hard earned FLHE dollars which makes it really annoying. Why can't I stop?
      2. SnGs, MTTs, tournaments seem to be a different kind of animal than cash. I feel like I dance on the edge of a blade and even when I have KK I have to tremble in fear because of some fucker's flush, draw, AA or other shit. Nothing is sure. I can never be comfortable in my chair and play confident poker, because I know even if I bet 2x the pot on a flush-drawish flop someone gonna call, they do irrational things, but they get the flop I play by the rules but better pre-flop hands worth nothing. Then again, I don't do what I should be doing. In the majority of the time I know the right move but I don't do it. I mean, what the fuck?
      3. For some reason I feel like I am meant to be a great SnG player. I want to be good. I learnt and keep learning, but nothing seems to work I don't apply what I learn, why the fuck? SnGs seem to be all about waiting, because shit hands follow trash ones and I feel fucked up, in early phase my flop ratio is somewhere 5-8% - I simply don't get playable hands according to the rules. What is going on?

      I am on the verge of crying.

      What do I need to do to actually do what I know I should?

      Somebody help, my self-confidence dribbles away....
  • 3 replies
    • Scarmaker
      Scarmaker
      Bronze
      Joined: 11.06.2009 Posts: 152
      Everytime I feel terrible after having a losing streak/hour/day/week/month, I say to myself: "Hey, you idiot, there are millions of people in the world, who work hard all fkin day to have enough money to get at least a little piece of bread. So stop acting like a biggest crybaby and be happy like hell, that you have this wonderful opportunity to win money by sitting at your computer - go for it and work hard!"

      Because, you know, even if you lose all the coinflips and your aces are cracked like 8 out 10 times, you are still far more lucky that a decent percentage of world population.
    • dember
      dember
      Bronze
      Joined: 17.04.2009 Posts: 158
      Yeah Scarmaker, but besides giving vent to my frustration by whining, the actual goal of the post was simply how to stay disciplined? How to have the discipline in SnGs to do what I know I should do?
      I sincerely want to improve and be a better SnG player. For that I need to develop a kind of discipline that is required for SnGs. There are situations whn I don't know where I stand, but most of the time I know exactly what I should do but I simply don't do it. Why? How can I acquire the discipline?
      Winning is so good... and I am ready to do anything. Learn poker, analyze my hands, and learn to be disciplined. But how?
    • Scarmaker
      Scarmaker
      Bronze
      Joined: 11.06.2009 Posts: 152
      Well, if you have a lack of discipline and consider it a really serious issue, then it doesn't have anything to do with poker and maybe you should find some qualified help... you know maybe a psychologist or something. Or look up some kind of forums about these things.

      What comes to my mind is maybe giving yourself some kind of goals or objectives for the day... and they don't have to do have anything with poker... You know like when you do exercising - "today I will make 60 push ups and eat this much of that stuff" and such. Be creative.

      I don't know how about you, but saying those above mentioned things to me while playing gets me motivated to play as good as I can.