[Closed] Don't discuss poker strategy at the tables FFS...

Good post and good advice. I myself can't be guilty, I know nothing about this thing called, what was it again? Pokkre?

I saw this the other day lol

I agree with this 100%.
Why would you want to teach a donkey to play well.
You want to have these bad players so you can win money from them.

LOL people that talk about how they play crack me up everytime. So I'm guilty of giving bad advice, but it's especially funny when the other person thinks the BS I said was the jizz ♦

I was guilty of doing this the other day. I couldn't help myself. Someone called a 3barrel bluff I did after raising UTG with 77 3rd pair and beat me, The chat went like this;

Villain; Wow.
Me; How the Hell did you call that?
Me; You must know that most Regulars will only Continue having Raised UTG with a REALLY tight range, like Jacks or Better or AK.....
Me; I don't understand HOW you called.
(I suddenly realised I shouldn't have broken my Silence and finished by writing this lol);
Me; Oh, w/e, Good Call. You had me beat :'(

Oh, and once i told a Fish to fold against another Reg so that i could stack him myself. LOL

ultimate guide to online poker chat:

1) You suck out on a fish: type "unlucky" or "sorry bro, good play"

2) A fish sucks out on you: type "nice hand"

3) Someone calls you a donkey or suggests a different play: type ":(( teach me please" or "yea im durnk lulz"

4a) Someone at your table is tilting and you believe you can make him go completely bonkers: type "ahahaahahah u fckin fishh u suk so bad"

4b) Someone at your table is tilting but you think if you insult him he'll just leave or start to play better: type "aww bro, unlucky for u" or "don't give up bro"

5) There is nobody chatting and you have some free time because you're 2-3 tabling: start chatting about recent sporting events, how rigged some other pokersite is, poker celebrities, etc.

6) Nobody is chatting and none of the above apply: be quiet

I turn the chat off altogether by clicking the notes tab instead. If you have the time to chat, you're not playing enough tables: it's distracting and fairly useless. It's better to use that time to take notes or open another table. Though I wonder if it's +EV to tell someone who discusses strategy in chat to shut the hell up...

The above goes for cash games, in case of MTT/SnG I rarely play enough to fill up my screen, and occasionally have the time to read the chat. Sometimes I can find (vague) reads on players, for example someone who just joined a $27 double-up SnG and immediately starts bitching about how he lost the last 3, vividly describing the hands he played, probably isn't playing his A-game and is susceptible to tilt.

I've seen a lot of MTTs on iPoker where Russian players join the table and the first thing they do is ask if anyone else is from Russia. Some of them try to make ridiculous deals like playing soft against each other. Once I've been in a hand HU with a guy talking to his buddy during the hand, and he literally told him what cards he had because he assumed no one else at the table understood Russian. A few similar cases in several other languages occurred in my MTT history, but that kind of tells is just too rare to rely on in cash games. As someone once said, "if you want to be a pro, keep off the chat!"

Once a guy pissed me off on an iPoker SnG by telling me I'm a bad player when I sucked out on him when I went allin from SB with some trash, because I had 5BB left and had to push any two against his too tight range.

So I checked his sharkscope and saw he was a long time loser at SnG's and announced it to everyone at the table about how he sucks after some more heated argument with him. Other players asked how I knew that about him... so... I basically taught everyone at the table about sharkscope

lol, never again. After realizing wtf I just did... I learned my lesson

Very interesting post mate. I completely agree.