[Closed] SonicXT' Career

Thanks, it's very comforting to read people are motivated by this blog.
Perhaps I should try to find the same out of it.

Hey Sonic, pick up yourself from the floor, Girls just dont come easy and drugs don't come cheap, the point is in the world we live in you need CA$H, money became religion, club and social status. Bad luck, depressions that all is just an excuse for yourself for how poor and incapable you actually are. If you will only search for the excuses why your life/poker career/whatever-you-want is so fucked up instead of changing the consequences, than I wish you your happy fucked-up life time. You're just a crappy no-one, one of bilions.. you just wasnt given the intelligence, the gift. Let it be your excuse... with excuse is everything so much easier, isn't it? It wasnt your fall, how could be? You couldnt change it..even a little bit, you still have AN EXCUSE

Dude, what the hell is your problem ?

Let me tell you something. I know the importance of money and I know my own qualities and shortcomings ... money is important, you're like that it is a status symbol and will get you far in some areas, but on the other hand, money in itself is just a mean, not a goal. Having lots of money won't make you succesful or happy, it just increases the possibility that you are either and might be a tool to become what you want to be. In itself however, excess money has no intrinsic value.

My temporary leave of the poker scene has nothing to do with finding an excuse. It's about using my time, which is limited to 24 hours a day minus sleep, to improve and work on the problems I'm facing right that are truely important to me. Having more money is not the number 1 on my list right now. Contrary to some apparently, I have my priorities straight and I'm using my time for the right purposes.

And yes, I'll manage to overcome whatever's been troubling me and I will be back in the poker world stronger than before. Because I do have talent and I do have common sense.

Start calling names is quite unjustified ... what have you proven to believe you have the right to take such a tone towards me, mister "Im here 2 months longer than Sonic is and am still at NL25 and on a break" ?

Hey Sonic,

I am absolutely of your opinion regarding this whole thing of money, poker and personal contentedness.
Having money is a good thing, but is definitely not enough to make someone happy. What I often ask myself is if I use my short living- time in the right way playing and thinking about poker for, let's say, 4 hours or so each day. Finding the right answer there is a difficult thing and the right response is also still not clear to me. Once I posted this question in my blog, but didn't get any answer, so I am not sure if anyone knows it.
That's why I totally can understand your break from poker and see it as the right way to solve your problems. That's the most important thing; go for it!

Lol @ Talic,

"Don't stop cause you are in a bad mental state!"

Was your post for real not a troll?

Good luck Sonic we all know you'll get there in the end

Originally posted by Petrificus
What I often ask myself is if I use my short living- time in the right way playing and thinking about poker for, let's say, 4 hours or so each day. Finding the right answer there is a difficult thing and the right response is also still not clear to me. Once I posted this question in my blog, but didn't get any answer, so I am not sure if anyone knows it.

I don't really understand your question. Could you rephrase it, maybe I can help ?

Originally posted by TerrorBlade
Lol @ Talic,

"Don't stop cause you are in a bad mental state!"

Was your post for real not a troll?

I hope it was some kind of joke.. not good one

Dude my problem is that I tried to explain you that there will be always something that would make you wrinkles on your forehead. And that excuse just makes you feel like "it was ment to be this way". Everyone when has hard times try to find excuses to make you the victim and the world the murderer, You're no exception, no one is. It is never for harm to mention that. I feel really sorry that the first thing you did was go to defensive approach. I used reverse psychology to make you realize how bitch your very own mind can be sometimes if you let it. Is that really that hard to find the meaning in it? Is that really that hard to remember that I always was writing compliments in this bloq?

so the ansfer for "what the hell is my problem" is "Do you honestly think I dont have nothing else to do but making flames? What would be the point at all? What is the point of flames at all? I dont possess these needs at all.

Petrificus, we are not in joga club or on meditation lesson, primary goal of playing poker is to make profit, would you disagree? We dont solve here the meaning of life.

I like your enthusiasm viewer88 for something that you barely understand

Originally posted by Talic
Petrificus, we are not in joga club or on meditation lesson, primary goal of playing poker is to make profit, would you disagree? We dont solve here the meaning of life.

Playing poker with the wrong state of mind or with a mentality that you can't win is like playing a casino game, it's ev-, fix the mental state and then he will be profitable again and resume playing what is so hard to understand about this?

Where did you read I'm finding excuses for something ? I'm taking a precautionary approach to just prevent me from making mistakes that would require excuses to be thought up later.
I don't feel victimized or subjugated to "my fate" or whatever you think it is I'm thinking about ... I'm getting it all straightened out my way, and as before, I'll be succesful at what I do as I am most of the times, given time and perseverence. If anything, it's the exact opposite of that what you accuse me off. Just wondering if you "barely understood" anything yourself here.

Sorry dude, I don't need your accusations. I would actually be more inclined to believe that you are the one projecting some problems you have on something or someone else as a way of dealing with things, becaues you are just cooking things up out of thin air.

The only thing that I might be accused of is that I say too much, sometimes in the hope of getting a supportive reaction. And guess what, no matter what some people think about that, it does help and I really do appreciate that so thanks to those people.

That's my final say about this. This blog so far has seemed to have helped inspire of motivate plenty of people in the English section and that's something I am both proud of and grateful for. As it appears there is some quality for other to be found herein, I intend to keep it clean and hope it could continue to inspire more as it has in the past. I won't hesitate to ask for post deletions if needed.

Petrificus, we are not in joga club or on meditation lesson, primary goal of playing poker is to make profit, would you disagree? We dont solve here the meaning of life.

Of course the primary goal of poker is gaining money, no doubt about that, but I doubt that you solve the meaning of life only in a joga club or elsewhere.
I mean, poker is something we deal with everyday, so it belongs to our life and I am just viewing it in a critical way.

For myself, I am not convinced, that I use the in front of the laptop-sitting-time right. It is not as if I am not enjoying playing poker (if so I would have quitted already) and I like thinking about the game, but I do not really know what it gives me for the future, when I have a job (hopefully ).
Especially, since I am playing low limits, which I am sure I can beat.

So, my question is, if you are always convinced of the online- gaming.

my question for talic is if you are on tilt, how do you make money? and if poker on tilt is ~0EV or -EV, and if you're not having fun while playing it, what's the point? you don't have it look at it philosophically... no one plays well on tilt and one way of rectifying that is trying to sort out the life problems causing tilt in the first place..

downswings sucks. Hope you will get out of it soon enough and hope thing in you're life will also go you're way.

After all, one of the purposes of a blog(at least I treat mine partially as such) is to cast away the negative energy from the poker tables and on the other hand, to share your sucesses.

I see nothing wrong in whining from time to time - it definitely makes you feel better.

GL in recovering!

It's not about whining ... luck is a part of the game on the short term and I've come to accept that. However, when external factors unexpectedly turn your life upside down and your general mental well-being has been thrown into disarray and confusion, you just need to hit the brakes and take a step back.

One big advantage that I have since I've become a part time loosely affiliated PokerStrategy employee is that I don't "need" the poker money anymore to cover my day to day expenses, so when I don't feel like playing, I don't have to anymore besides doing hand evaluation and coachings for the Dutch community, where I can still motivate myself because I'm doing something for the greater good, I have other who depend on my expertise and reserve time to attend coaching or post and reply to hand histories and I can't let those down of course. Tilt is no factor at coaching anyway, having people watching keeps me concentrated on doing the right thing.

All in all though, my break hasn't been a true break. I might have hit the brakes on my poker frequency but I haven't come to complete stop. At the moment, I playing at a 400 SP a week rate, which is of course low for a NL100SH but I'm playing when I feel like playing and I want to ... not because I need the money or need the points, which is a huge advantage, because when I play now, I'll always have the right attitude towards the game. At the moment, my bankroll is back at 3100 € which is a very safe zone for NL100SH. I have PartyPoker's Big Deal Promotion to thank for 650 $ and the rest comes from fishes that I waited patiently for to deliver the final verdict upon and drown.

ps : I want a HU4Rollz vs Talic (who keeps extending his break after bashing me, weird)

unfortunately, talic probably doesn't have much of a roll right now given what he posted on jordgubban's blog.

gl on going through your rough patch.

gl sonic and shoot me a line sometime. i welcome any and all distractions to all things study- and uni- related.

Originally posted by Talic
I used reverse psychology

....Please stop trying to be clever Talic. This isn't the place for it and you're just coming across as offensive.

GL with everything Sonic, I enjoyed flicking through your blog. That PartyPoker Big Deal Promo was great wasn't it

Yea, I didn't expect to win anything at all with it as those promotion usually require a huge amount of luck, or are high-roller only (like it's PS promo thing), so it was a welcome surprise

I played a few session outside BRM the last couple of days, namely at NL200SH and a few PLO100/200 sessions. Well, I did this not because of greed, but as a tool to work on my game...

In the past, I had beaten NL100SH so many times over in the past and frustration had begun to set in as I needed to beat it again and again after suffering some setbacks (nephew whiping roll, selfinflicted blackjack wounds etc)
I noticed that I however started to expect the huge winrates of the past to be eternal and constant. This of course being impossible, it did influence my game to the extent I'd get frustrated quite fast if things weren't going my way and spewy play combined many "curiosity" calls were actually bringing my real winrate down to no more than 2PTBB/100 which is, for my standard, sub par.

Playing outside BRM, one level higher, however could be a good idea for a while. If I keep an eye on variance and move back when things start to go awry, it should give me the opportunity to refrain from spewy plays and -EV calls because they simply get too costly, while focussing on the real goal of the game, playing the A game. Scared money is no factor...
Of course, I do this only because I have the experience by now to know what the risks of this strategy are and have good reasons to give this a temporary goal. If a main weakness has become "no respect for money" and "demotivation due to repetitiveness", this might be a temporary cure.

My bankroll is still at 3100 € however, but I have temporarily withdrawn 500 € to give my brother a loan for his car repairs, so my real roll should be about 3600 € or 4500 $ ... 22 stacks.