Glad to hear you had the discipline to focus on school, gotta keep the priorities right. Poker will still be there when you have spare time. 
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19 days since last update. Well what can I say...
First of all I still play poker but I`m mixing up zoom poker, sngs and MTTs which ,as I think, causes a lot of mistakes in my play. But I still make some profit in between. One thing that I really learned since I started this blog is to stop playing when I lose. My biggest downswing so far has been 19 sngs lost in a row which I took straight to my hearth 
Next day I had rly big upswing in SNGs, I actually made 30+ BI in one day which was an amazing confidence boost.
Then I did something I shouldn`t do again (which actually turned out good) I tripled my bankroll in 2 hours playing NL50 HU games. I withdrew half of my bankroll and had just a great two weeks with it 
Funny thing is that I started this session just randomly waking up at 1 at night and instantly grabbed my laptop and joined some zoom poker for quick warmup ♦
Hellllo everyone,
what an interesting blog I have started here 6 years ago, it`s so fun to look back at the things you said and thought such a long time ago. There are not too many posts in this "Real life downswing" blog, but it says enough about me already.
I think I always get inspired to play poker in spring and fall. It`s something about having a financial freedom and working your own hours that motivates me to play this game for so long.
What happened from 2012-2018 with poker, studies and life in general?
I passed my studies, moved to the capital city to leave my toxic friends group, to work and most importantly to find my now girlfriend of 4 years. We have both traveled and worked in the UK and Netherlands together for 3 years. After about 6 months of working, we try to go back home and pursue our passions, which is poker for me and digital designing for my girlfriend. We haven`t done major steps but were definitely better each time around.
Pokerwise I have been struggling, those times when I`m home and grinding, I see myself chasing the money too much, putting away studying, going outside or even stepping away from the computer.
This last year I had a good success in spin and gos, playing 3$ and 5$ spins, over 5000 games, which suited my personality at the time where I would get bored playing MTTs and wanted fast action.
Plans for 2018
[*] I hate planning
Haven`t played poker in a month, I will deposit some money and try to grind my bankroll up. I have a lot of learning material ready so studying is going to be a priority. Gonna play some SNGs at Pokerstars and then move to Partypoker to play MTTs. Thats the plan for now.
See ya
Played some a sngs and tournaments yesterday and watched 2 videos from a poker site, which I had an subscription to some while ago. Got to know a lot about HM2 filters and how to review your game. Had a look on my last year stats and results and saw some leaks which should be easily fixed.
As Im working full time, I try to play and study when theres free time for extras like that ♦ Also its hard to switch at first from having all day to yourself and planning it as you wish.
At work I thought about what good and bad things has poker brought into my life over the years and came up with some stuff.
These things come from myself while comparing me to the people around me in my life.
Positive things from poker
+ Multitasking - people around me dont know how it is to play 10 tables at once, so while doing random everyday things, they tend to do everything very slowly and it seems they use a lot of brain processing power to do two or three simple things at the same time
+ Logic - There is logic to everything, words spoken and actions taken. Coming up with the fastest most precise and optimal way to do things, requires logic. Poker makes you seek for it all the time and I think it reflects to real life as well.
+ Mental game/tilt awareness - while losing MTT at 10th place can be very tilting, we all have been in really frustrating , tilting, sickening spots more than enough times. We have had our mental strength checked almost every day more than once. Of course awareness is the key, if you dont know youre mad and you dont make progress towards fighting your mental weaknesses then all the "suffering" from poker is for nothing
+ Variance/Long term - Playing for the long term in poker and life is the way to go. Understanding that almost impossible things can happen and will happen to you or someone else around you, prepares you for the hard hits life can give you.
+ Psychology - same as logic and mental game, the game is built around it. Why he does what he does, why am I reacting the way I am? It can be a very good tool in real life which can be sharpened by playing poker
Negative things from poker
- Selfishness - poker is a selfish game in its self. You want to destroy everyone and take all their money, there is only take, take and take which can become depressive over time. I think coaching, writing a blog, streaming, reviewing other peoples game and teaching your friends how to play can be a great way to give back to the poker community and feel some kind of connection.
- No socializing - All of the above can be applied here as well. Playing 12 hours a day can be exhausting and not talking to anyone while playing can be even harder. While I think poker players have more time to them selves as a regular job worker, sometimes its hard to get away from poker and do other stuff
- Health problems - eyes, back, neck, wrists, shoulders - one of the worst things you can do to yourself is sitting all day, we have to move, do sports, stretch, swim
- Computer screen all day - there has to be hobbies away from screens, playing 12h sessions and then playing games 4 hours is not good.
I might be a shitty person
But I just accepted that I'm insanely competitive.
If I can't outplay someone in something I just start getting depressed, life seems dull. I loved sports, I loved high octane lifestyle of commision only sales where winners get praised and losers ignored, I love online gaming and I love poker, I love high performers.
Socialising
Poker players have actually more potential than this than 90% of professions because of flexibility. It's just harder to start because you don't get the automatic practice with coworkers. So you have to put in the effort but you can get a much higher quality social life than someone who is forced into the same small work circle of coworkers at set times.
But let me tell you, the most social time in my life (behind sales of course) was when I took a year to use poker for socialising, workign out, travelling meeting women and cool people in general . Same goes for working out, it's just an insane advantage to be able to overtrain and take a day off the next day, have total flexibility. Only computer screen you can't do anything about.
I think Poker's just that - if you don't put in the active effort it's a dull, repetitive, isolationist profession where if you're just cruising it gets you to miss things "normal" people get automatically. Some people say it's for the exchange of money, but the same people who do only poker burn out fast and quit
Great post Lemon,
I think players fall into isolation when the main goal is the money. If youre trying to get money fast, then its going to end fast.
Poker is more of a lifestyle as you said, there has to be more activities than poker to keep your sanity. Only staying at home and playing can be a disaster. Sometimes its hard to find a balanced place, where every important thing in your life gets the time it deserves. In the end it all comes down to the little things, which ultimately make the bigger picture in the future. I recently saw a picture saying something like this: "People who talk about time travel say they would be scared to change their past doing something very small since it can dramatically change their future, but in reality they don`t think they can change their future right now in the present doing small things."
Yesterday played the 11$ zoom progressive KO tournament, which is my favorite type of mtt. Finished in 12th place, played the zoom part really nicely, but when zoom stopped at 18 people, I started to do some big mistakes. Going to review and post some interesting hands from the late game part.
Instead of always learning new strategies,ranges, charts,betting etc, theres always the mental side of poker.
Now that Im not playing poker 40 hours a week, but around 10 instead, I started to notice some of the bigger leaks I have.
Desperation tilt. Walking away from a losing session seems hard for me. Either I end on a winning session or I lose a lot more than I should. Also Im playing a lot less focused and being too desperate to win makes my decisions flawed.
Doing something else while playing. When Im down to 2 or 3 tables I sometimes open up youtube and watch some videos, which can be bad because, theres a lot you can miss at the table, youre more focused on the videos and I could be playing more tables while youtube would not be there.
Playing long hours without breaks from computer screen. Depends if I have some MTTS open, but I ussually dont really get away from the screen longer than 20 minutes. It can be very mentally tiring and also getting up, stretching and walking is very good for the body.
Playing 10 hours a week can be more productive than 40 hours. Playing your A game is the key, so if you play 10 hours very good and 30 hours very average or bad then why bother. Those 30 hours could be spent doing something more productive inside and outside of poker.
Had a final table recently and finished 4th. Once again it was a zoom KO mtt, my favorite. Again I made some huge mistakes on the later stages, when theres like 20 people left. I feel like my lategame and FT game needs some improvements. I play too many hands and try to win by getting people off the pot. Most of the players on micro mtts dont really think through hands, so instead I have to go for value more and use the fold button more often.
Havent done any studying and reviewing lately as Im working a lot right now and we recently moved to a slightly better place.
Like 1 week ago me and my gf were at Lana del Rey concert in Antwerpen. Both the concert and the city were nice, would love to live there. My gf has always wanted to see Lana live and now we had a chance and we took it.
