Hi, I'm sirilidion and I'm from the Netherlands I write this blog to get rid of my frustration of just an awful poker day. I know what you all are going to say, variance, downswing and I know all that but since I am not playing any more poker today I might give you an idea of my pokerexperience so far.
My first game of poker was like three years ago at my chessclub with some members. It was a game of 5 card draw cashgame and I was just awfull at it mostly because I got nervious when there where betting more money.
My first hold'em tourney was a fixed limit tourney in it casino in Groningen with a buy-in of 10 euros with the possibility to re-buy. This was played with 10 people for an hour and the 2 people with the most chips went to the final later that night. This set-up made it a real crapshot and has nothing to do with poker. and I didn't came in the money. The first real NL Hold'em SNG I played was during a chess tournament in Dieren we played every day that weak and I playing around even at the end. the chesstournament went awful btw 
but that could have been because we were playing poker everyday till 2.00- 3.00 ♦.
My first tournament was in January 2007 with 64 players and I came in 3rd. the next two tournament I played where with 30 player and I finished 3rd in them too. by my succes I thought I had to be I good player, well I was wrong and experienced my first downswing not being able to to anything right in months.
Then the casinos started offering fixed limit cashgames 2/4 euros with a munium buy-in of 40 euros. I played theses with some succes but I also liked to gamble then and what I won at poker I lost to blackjack,roulette and the most horrible multipoker.
when the casino began offering 30 player tourney with a buy-in of 30 + 5 I was there amd I won. should have been 2nd but I sucked-out in just a horrible way. I had 25o whened all-in and a guy called my with 66 the flop was 77Q, turn 2, river 2 making a fullhouse over his 2 pair I don't know what the odds against that are but I know it is pretty small.
Haven't had much succes on internet till this year and spend too much money on it. When I discovered this site I relised I was way to much trying not to be bluffed and there for paying many people of with the 2nd best hand then picking the right spots to maximising my changes of winning.
The first 50 dollar of the site I lost do I was playing like I always was and not paying any atentience to bankrollmanagement. after that I really began reading all the articles and watch all the videos. when I deposited 85 dollars too I had learned I lot and because of that it was the first time I got my bankroll above 200 dollars I even made it to 400 dollars but then I had an awful downswing followed with a tilt totally not paying too bankrollmanagement any more I lost my entire banroll in just a couple of days.
knowing what I did wrong I tried to overcome my tilts and leared I lot these couple of months. yesterday I played a tourney of 10 + 1 ( when my bankroll was 100, yes I no not really bankroll management bad,bad,bad but I really like these tourneys ♦) whise 28 players and came in 2nd making 84 bucks. today I was playing the 5 + 0,50 sng and got sucked out between 20 to 30 times in 12 sng's and lost 28 bucks. the only possitive thing about this that I had my oppents on the right handrange all the time, I just lost almost all 60/40, 70/30 fav and some 80/20 fav I also lost and I lost with KK against AA.
exept for the articles I have read Super System, Theory of poker and Caro's book of pokertells
Hope you enjoyed and hoping to update with some better news soon.
down $10 myself 
