hi,
how much rakeback can i get on your site with fdb and hows traffic on nl50/100 tables ? 
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Yea and 1k down in 500 hands @ NL200. I 3bet / 5bet KJs twice and 88 once vs. regs with 7-10% (and it was BTN vs. blinds, so prolly even bigger there) 4betranges - and run to AK vs. KJ twice and KK vs. 88. Again I'm completely tilted and desperate.
[Edit: Even though everyone probably thinks they're unlucky, I really think I've ran incredibly bad with the 6000 hands I've played NL200. I've gotten absolutely no action to my monsters, and everytime I bluff I ran into peoples top ranges. I've also ran 7 bins under EV, and I've had a monster draw over 200bb (+15 outs) deep many times vs. nitty big fishes, gotten minraised on the turn, just called since they always have it, but never gotten my draws completed. Admittedly I've also tilted off many bins. It's just when you move up and run bad it's 2 times the bad run you would have had at the lower stake. Well I ran superbly when I started NL100, so I shouldn't complain - but still it's very frustrating.
Ps. I try to talk sense to myself here to prevent tilting. Injecting logic like the Tendler's book advocates.]
Yea how the fuck can u win with these kind of hands. There were vs. the same opponent, in a row. I wanna thrash something so bad.
Entraction, $1/$2 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 4 Players
Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite.
Hero (CO): $203 (101.5 bb)
BTN: $336.50 (168.3 bb)
SB: $200 (100 bb)
BB: $296.50 (148.3 bb)
Preflop: Hero is CO with J
Q
Hero raises to $6, BTN raises to $16, 2 folds, Hero calls $10
Flop: ($35) T 2 K
(2 players)
Hero checks, BTN bets $20, Hero raises to $50, BTN calls $30
Turn: ($135) 2
(2 players)
Hero bets $137 and is all-in, BTN calls $137
River: ($409) A (2 players, 1 is all-in)
Results:
Spoiler
$409 pot ($3 rake)
Final Board: T 2 K 2 A
Hero showed J Q and lost (-$203 net)
BTN showed T T
and won $406 ($203 net)
----------------
Entraction, $1/$2 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 4 Players
Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite.
Hero (SB): $226.60 (113.3 bb)
BB: $207.50 (103.8 bb)
CO: $200 (100 bb)
BTN: $296.50 (148.3 bb)
Preflop: Hero is SB with J A
2 folds, Hero raises to $6, BB calls $4
Flop: ($12) T K Q (2 players)
Hero bets $8, BB calls $8
Turn: ($28) T (2 players)
Hero bets $19, BB calls $19
River: ($66) 8 (2 players)
Hero bets $49, BB raises to $100, Hero calls $51
Results:
Spoiler
$266 pot ($3 rake)
Final Board: T K Q T 8
Hero mucked J A and lost (-$133 net)
BB showed Q T and won $263 ($130 net)
--------------
I wanna tilt my money away again.
Originally posted by Zebbu
Even though I had a few big tilt sessions at the end of October, it was still the best month of my "career".Here's the link to the results. The updated Imgur is messing with me, it posts the non-edited pictures with the BBC-code.
Winnings: 3709
Rakeback: 3039*0.3 = 912
Race winnings: 115+95+650+135 = 995Total profit: 5616 €
That's actually a pretty big monthly wage in Finland - a country of envious socialists. Doctors earn that on average - and they have to pay the ridicilous taxes. However, I don't really consider my winnings as money: I think of them as big blinds, or as a means to reach higher limits within a reasonable bank roll management system. When I need something I withdraw some money from my Skrill account, but usually as little as possible - if I have money on my bank account it's gone almost immediately.
------------------
I remember that before summer I used to dream about making over 2k€ a month playing poker. Well, I've made over 3k€ 3 months in a row, but now I wanna make 10k€ a month. And I want it really bad. I want to accomplish something before I'm a rotten carcass six feet under.
I was pretty good in sports when growing up, but at some point when being gifted was not enough any more - when u had to start really working to make it - that's when I didn't have the inner drive to keep on going. Same with school: I never did anything for it but got good grades anyway, until at end of high school they dropped cuz' I still didn't do squat.
That's the problem I have with myself: I don't have - nor have I ever had - a goal, I have no purpose, no inner dream that keeps me going forward. I have no mountain peek to qonquer in my life's horizon.
But how about poker? When I was in high school I checked the time all the time - cuz' I wanted to go home and play Championship Manager. And I did, for the rest of the day, unless there was no sports practise. (And I really enjoyed looking at all the stats.) That's the way it's with poker now: when I wake up, I eat something as fast as possible so I can start grinding. And when I stop playing all I can think of is some hands I played, what I should have done in that spot, and so on. So I really like poker. It's like a video game to me, and a really good one: it offers both the competional drive that I enjoy, and the statistical & logical aspect I also greatly derive pleasure from.
But that's not the main thing. What's important is that I will never be able to enjoy life as a 9to5 John Doe, raising my family in the suburbs. This is not to put down those who do - everyone should live their life as they see fit. “Normal people can be happy with a regular life. I was different. I felt there was more to life than just plodding through an average existence.” - Arnold Schwarzenegger. And when u add to this my complete introversion and dislike of "social networking" and what-not, it's not an easy equation in this day of age.
But: what I've started to realize is that for me poker is a means to escape, a way to beat the system. A way to make money without having to endure eight hours doing something utterly boring. Without playing the status/hierarchy games people play and of which I truly hate and suck at. I will probably start learning Forex trading / investing / other stuff too. Anything I can make money with clicking buttons in solitude. And sometime in the future I want to write something, and maybe I will start taking photographing seriously too. Maybe I should write & photograph a picture travel book? Sounds cool.
But for now, I want to make it in poker. I want money and success. I want my friend who laughed when I said I'd make 50k next year playing poker to see I've made 100k, and after that 200k. I want fancy cars, custom suits, and all that. Call me shallow, but that's the way I am.
---------------------
[This is a rather silly and artificial sounding piece of writing]
Very interesting post 
similar to me in some ways.
Now stop tilting! ♦
Euan
I mean, WTF is this. I flopped the practical nuts vs. a huge fish 400bb deep, and what do you know - runner runner straight. He would have called me down, so instead of winning 200 bb's, I lost 120. I don't know how much longer I can take this shit.
Entraction, $1/$2 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 4 Players
BB: $269.98 (135 bb)
CO: $965.84 (482.9 bb)
Hero (BTN): $775.49 (387.7 bb)
SB: $271.11 (135.6 bb)
Preflop: Hero is BTN with 2 2
CO raises to $7, Hero calls $7, 2 folds
Flop: ($17) K 2 Q (2 players)
CO bets $12.75, Hero raises to $35, CO calls $22.25
Turn: ($87) 9 (2 players)
CO checks, Hero bets $67, CO calls $67
River: ($221) T (2 players)
CO bets $110.50, Hero calls $110.50
Results: $442 pot ($3 rake)
Final Board: K 2 Q 9 T
CO showed K J and won $439 ($219.50 net)
Hero mucked 2 2 and lost (-$219.50 net)
And it feels like this happens every effin' time. This month's hands so far. It's not that bad, but the past 2 weeks or so have been pretty tough for me mentally. What's bad is that I've been feeling like sh*t outside the tables also cuz' of the bad run. I guess I have a lot of mental leaks - but I don't know how to fix them.
I'm very rarely if ever folding river here vs. a fish who might do this with 2 pair as some sort blocking / value bet not knowing how to play. I'm pretty sure I'm good here 25% of the time. Only vs. the nitty fish I might fold.
Edit: And I've read the book (2 times at least), but I'm really not sure how it's suppose to help. I mean sure, I identify the types of tilt I have and what makes me tilt - but knowing the reasons to tilting does nothing to prevent me getting super frustrated and kinda hopeless when I face a prolonged run of negative variance.
TBH I think you played the hand well. I am not folding this river if it's a really big fish either and especially when he only bets half pot. He bets pot then we have a different story.
With regards to flop sizing I think it's fine. Only one draw and we don't want him to fold his Qx hands which he may be capable of calling with if he is bad enough.
Maybe try moving back down to NL100? That way you might stop dwelling on the losses as they will be only half as big when negative variance shows it's face.
You can always move back up when you feel you have improved
Euan.
@ kokos99sd
Well u get 30% RB, FDB equals 20% RB, and race winnings equals about 25-35% RB. So that's 75-85%. However, there are no games @ NL50/NL100 - when 24hpoker announced moving to Microgaming, the little there were driep up too. There are maybe 3-4 tables going on at 18-24 pm, but that's about it. So before the move to Microgaming is made, no point in playing there. And I have no idea about the rake races when on Microgaming.
@ swanny36
Yea I'm playing NL100 till Thursday. Then I'm going to Köln for a holiday for 4 days to "watch football" (=getting drunk) with my friends. So that gives me a nice break from poker, and after that it's like a new start with a fresh and positive attitude.
[Edit: and with Köln I mean Cologne. Köln is how it's written in Finnish]
Yea. Played ten hands: JJ vs. QQ BvB, and fish rivering trips vs. my overpair in 3bet pot - down 200 € immediately. So maybe 15th session in a row where I get super frustrated before I've even properly started playing.
EDIT: 100 hands - 400 € down. Gonna be a long and super frustrating night again chasing losses. And I feel completely tilted and hopeless again.
[EDIT 2] Won the biggest pot of my life against a tilted reg fish:
Entraction, $1/$2 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 5 Players
CO: $207.25 (103.6 bb)
Hero (BTN): $413.99 (207 bb)
SB: $265.66 (132.8 bb)
BB: $200 (100 bb)
MP: $299.25 (149.6 bb)
Preflop: Hero is BTN with 3 3
MP raises to $5.75, CO folds, Hero calls $5.75, SB folds, BB calls $3.75
Flop: ($18.25) 3 6 9 (3 players)
BB checks, MP bets $15, Hero raises to $43, BB folds, MP raises to $293.50 and is all-in, Hero calls $250.50
Turn: ($605.25) T (2 players, 1 is all-in)
River: ($605.25) Q (2 players, 1 is all-in)
Results: $605.25 pot ($3 rake)
Final Board: 3 6 9 T Q
Hero showed 3 3 and won $602.25 ($303 net)
BB mucked and lost (-$5.75 net)
MP showed K K and lost (-$299.25 net)
----------------
My tilting is getting completely ridiculous. Well only 3 days for the vacation & break.
You should enjoy Köln, especially if you haven't been before - I was there earlier this year, and was stunned by the size and grandeur of the Dom; I remember being somewhat underwhelmed by St Paul's Cathedral in London, so this made up for it - a real cathedral.
Good luck with the tilt-reduction; I'm also trying out NL200, and feel bad enough being down two buy-ins after only 189 hands, although somehow it always feels better if I know I didn't make a mistake, or can see clearly how not to repeat the mistake.
Your blog is informative and inspiring and a lot of fun to read, so keep posting!
Originally posted by Zebbu
@ kokos99sdWell u get 30% RB, FDB equals 20% RB, and race winnings equals about 25-35% RB. So that's 75-85%. However, there are no games @ NL50/NL100 - when 24hpoker announced moving to Microgaming, the little there were driep up too. There are maybe 3-4 tables going on at 18-24 pm, but that's about it. So before the move to Microgaming is made, no point in playing there. And I have no idea about the rake races when on Microgaming.
thats so freaking cool!
but well 4 tables are not enough for me 
....so how is it possible u still playing there then? and whats your plan for future? moving to microgaming?
I've never played more than 6 tables, so I'm fine with playing only 4 tables for a few days while waiting for the move to Microgaming - and yea, that's were I'm going to play in the future. What I understand I'm gonna get a new FDB with 24hpoker up to 1000€, so gonna get very good returnings at the start.
Ok. So the move to Microgaming with 24hpoker has happened.
I think it's gonna take a long time for me get in touch with the new software. That's why I've never played outside Entraction/IGM - I never had the patience to play long enough on a new software so that I'd get accustomed to it. And I really was accustomed with the 24hpoker/other Entraction sites software: the lobby (I instantly knew whether the game was worth playing) and the betting system (everything was sort of on a level of unconscious competence - that is, I didn't even have to look at the betting slider or the keyboard or anything, I could have almost played blindfolded had I known the players and the action on the table.)
Well, now I have no choice but to get in touch with Microgaming. Gonna start with 2 tables of NL50, slowly add 1 and then 2 tables. Then gonna start with 2 tables of NL100, and add tables when I feel comfortable. Hopefully soon. I want some moniez.
Pretty excited about Microgaming actually. Now I should be able to play any time I feel like doing so + there were at least 2 fishes on all the tables I played @ NL100 - but that could have obviously been just positive table selection variance.
And yea, I played 20 hands of NL50, but then I was like meh, let's just go for NL100.
I also recently made the switch to microgaming. It is indeed quite fishy. I recently played at a table without any other reg/decent player, only fish!
to move or not to move? thats the question 
(i have 75% rakeback + this month on cake but traffic is pretty low and not 100%% sure my funds are safe there)
Yea. 4 days break, and completely tilted again. I keep flopping the nuts, but every fucking time they end up being thrash by the river - after putting 60-70% of my stack in. Then I tilt and spew. I really wanna quit poker right now, the runner runner quads vs. my set was the final straw.