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Life After The Farm - From Noob To Ninja

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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Originally posted by H0witzer

Originally posted by jiffybag
these players aren't going to kick their own asses.

It's very curious that they don't kick their own asses with how they play most of the time :censored:

Mate, don't get me started, I spent most of the day getting bluffed right in the face by fish who can bluff me because I fold, but I can't bluff them, because they don't fold. And on the boards that hit them right in the ballz and then they show me air :appl: :pcuser:

The bluffing thing, you don't bluff calling stations. I know. But strange thing happend, this one fish, who is kinda reg fish, started folding to my thin value bets, so when we ended up HU, I started betting small as a bluff and he started to fold. And the big ones, where he doesn't fold and floats to steal (gut shot, btm pair, etc), I started doing only with strong hands and then I mixed in small bets, followed by big ones. I have to walk a very thin line with what kinda hands I can get away with betting as they limp calling almost 70% hands (I think 70% huds don't work on this site) and if I raise or call or 3bet I am normally 3 or 4 handed on the flop.

I just finished my session now and I wanted to start bitching about why does my winning days never look like my losing days on this site and then I remembered I am up overall for the month after my cash out, and my winning days something blows away whole losing months, so stop crying and man the fuck up.

Now on GGP on the other hand :facepalm: :pcuser:


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mkBISCUIT
Joined: 19.01.2018

Jiffybag,
I think what you want to do playing NL2 is play your good/made hands fast, do not slow play anything, as well as fold to any aggression, villain show. I know it blows to get shown some bluffs, but there is also a better spot to caught someone being out of line, especially at NL2.

Use solid opening ranges- like UTG 8%-10% MP 11%-13% CO 18%-28% BTN 35%-45% Sb 41% about. eventually playing stronger ranges then villains will pay off at these stakes, I would have to look at stats to help you out more, but these are some ideas off the cuff for you. Good luck bud! Be safe!


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Originally posted by mkBISCUIT
Jiffybag,
I think what you want to do playing NL2 is play your good/made hands fast, do not slow play anything, as well as fold to any aggression, villain show. I know it blows to get shown some bluffs, but there is also a better spot to caught someone being out of line, especially at NL2.

Use solid opening ranges- like UTG 8%-10% MP 11%-13% CO 18%-28% BTN 35%-45% Sb 41% about. eventually playing stronger ranges then villains will pay off at these stakes, I would have to look at stats to help you out more, but these are some ideas off the cuff for you. Good luck bud! Be safe!

I'll try, the session above I am referring to is at 50nl and 20nl on our local site, if exchange rates apply, then 2nl and 5nl :f_ugly:
I'll post some hands from my last ggp session where I fast played...


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mkBISCUIT
Joined: 19.01.2018

just giving some advice, on those stakes everyone chases hands, so you get your bb/winrate up just by continuing to bet your good hands.


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

I had this dude right where I wanted him, I hit the big boot and went to drop the leg...

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

CO: $2.87 (143.5 bb)
BTN: $2.00 (100 bb)
SB: $4.00 (200 bb)
BB: $2.10 (105 bb)
UTG: $1.47 (73.5 bb)
Hero (MP): $2.39 (119.5 bb)

SB posts $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has K♣: Q♠:
fold, Hero raises to $0.06, 3 folds, BB calls $0.04

Flop: ($0.13, 2 players) K♦: 2♠: 8♣:
BB checks, Hero bets $0.07, BB raises to $0.14, Hero raises to $0.58, BB calls $0.44

Turn: ($1.29, 2 players) 4♥:
BB checks, Hero bets $1.75 and is all-in, BB calls $1.46 and is all-in

River: ($4.21, 2 players) 9♦:

Results: $4.21 pot ($0.25 rake)
Final Board: K♦: 2♠: 8♣: 4♥: 9♦:

Hero shows K♣: Q♠:: (One Pair, Kings)
(Pre 45%, Flop 91%, Turn 95%)

BB shows 9♥: 9♣:: (Three of a Kind, Nines)
(Pre 55%, Flop 9%, Turn 5%)

BB wins $3.94


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

I should be spending this money right now....

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

BTN: $3.21 (160.5 bb)
SB: $2.00 (100 bb)
BB: $4.02 (201 bb)
UTG: $2.10 (105 bb)
MP: $0.75 (37.5 bb)
Hero (CO): $2.26 (113 bb)

SB posts $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has A♣: Q♦:
fold, MP raises to $0.05, Hero raises to $0.18, 3 folds, MP calls $0.13

Flop: ($0.39, 2 players) J♥: 3♣: K♥:
MP checks, Hero checks

Turn: ($0.39, 2 players) A♠:
MP checks, Hero bets $0.58, MP calls $0.57 and is all-in

River: ($1.53, 2 players) 8♣:

Results: $1.53 pot ($0.07 rake)
Final Board: J♥: 3♣: K♥: A♠: 8♣:

Hero shows A♣: Q♦:: (One Pair, Aces)
(Pre 70%, Flop 86%, Turn 86%)

MP shows 8♦: A♦:: (Two Pair, Aces and Eights)
(Pre 30%, Flop 14%, Turn 14%)

MP wins $1.44


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Whoa brother

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

MP: $2.08 (104 bb)
CO: $2.44 (122 bb)
BTN: $1.96 (98 bb)
SB: $1.57 (78.5 bb)
BB: $3.27 (163.5 bb)
Hero (UTG): $2.00 (100 bb)

SB posts $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has A♦: A♥:

Hero raises to $0.06, 2 folds, BTN calls $0.06, fold, BB calls $0.04

Flop: ($0.19, 3 players) 2♣: T♠: 2♦:
BB checks, Hero bets $0.12, fold, BB calls $0.12

Turn: ($0.43, 2 players) 7♣:
BB checks, Hero bets $0.24, BB raises to $0.66, Hero calls $0.42

River: ($1.75, 2 players) 5♣:
BB checks, Hero checks

Results: $1.75 pot ($0.08 rake)
Final Board: 2♣: T♠: 2♦: 7♣: 5♣:

BB shows 2♥: J♠:: (Three of a Kind, Twos)

(Pre 12%, Flop 91%, Turn 95%)

Hero shows A♦: A♥:: (Two Pair, Aces and Twos)
(Pre 88%, Flop 9%, Turn 5%)

BB wins $1.65


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Some bluffs that went right

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 5 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

BTN: $2.15 (107.5 bb)
SB: $1.62 (81 bb)
BB: $2.00 (100 bb)
Hero (UTG): $2.70 (135 bb)
CO: $4.41 (220.5 bb)

SB posts $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has J♦: Q♦:
Hero raises to $0.06, CO raises to $0.11, 2 folds, BB calls $0.09, Hero calls $0.05

Flop: ($0.34, 3 players) 9♦: T♣: 2♦:
BB bets $0.17, Hero calls $0.17, CO calls $0.17

Turn: ($0.85, 3 players) 3♥:
BB checks, Hero bets $0.46, fold, BB calls $0.46

River: ($1.77, 2 players) 6♥:
BB checks, Hero bets $1.94, fold

Results: $1.77 pot ($0.08 rake)
Final Board: 9♦: T♣: 2♦: 3♥: 6♥:

Hero wins $1.67

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

CO: $2.13 (106.5 bb)
BTN: $2.50 (125 bb)
SB: $2.00 (100 bb)
BB: $2.52 (126 bb)
UTG: $3.00 (150 bb)
Hero (MP): $2.00 (100 bb)

SB posts $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has 6♥: 6♣:
fold, Hero raises to $0.06, 2 folds, SB raises to $0.26, fold, Hero calls $0.20

Flop: ($0.54, 2 players) 7♠: T♥: 3♦:
SB checks, Hero checks

Turn: ($0.54, 2 players) J♥:
SB checks, Hero bets $0.32, SB calls $0.32

River: ($1.18, 2 players) 5♦:
SB checks, Hero bets $1.42 and is all-in, fold

Results: $1.18 pot ($0.05 rake)
Final Board: 7♠: T♥: 3♦: J♥: 5♦:

Hero wins $1.11

And some that didn't...

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 5 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

CO: $2.15 (107.5 bb)
BTN: $1.61 (80.5 bb)
SB: $2.00 (100 bb)
Hero (BB): $3.63 (181.5 bb)
UTG: $4.13 (206.5 bb)

SB posts $0.01, Hero posts BB $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has A♣: 6♣:
UTG calls $0.02, fold, BTN calls $0.02, fold, Hero raises to $0.09, UTG raises to $0.16, fold, Hero calls $0.07

Flop: ($0.35, 2 players) Q♥: 4♣: T♠:
Hero checks, UTG checks

Turn: ($0.35, 2 players) 7♠:
Hero checks, UTG checks

River: ($0.35, 2 players) 3♠:
Hero checks, UTG bets $0.21, Hero raises to $0.98, UTG calls $0.77

Results: $2.31 pot ($0.11 rake)
Final Board: Q♥: 4♣: T♠: 7♠: 3♠:

Hero shows A♣: 6♣:: (High Card, Ace)
(Pre 12%, Flop 6%, Turn 0%)

UTG shows A♥: A♦:: (One Pair, Aces)
(Pre 88%, Flop 94%, Turn 100%)

UTG wins $2.18

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

UTG: $2.00 (100 bb)
MP: $1.27 (63.5 bb)
CO: $2.41 (120.5 bb)
BTN: $1.87 (93.5 bb)
SB: $2.20 (110 bb)
Hero (BB): $3.29 (164.5 bb)

SB posts $0.01, Hero posts BB $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has A♥: Q♠:
fold, MP calls $0.02, CO raises to $0.08, fold, SB calls $0.07, Hero raises to $0.38, 2 folds, SB calls $0.30

Flop: ($0.86, 2 players) 9♠: 9♣: 2♥:
SB checks, Hero bets $0.30, SB calls $0.30

Turn: ($1.46, 2 players) 6♥:
SB checks, Hero checks

River: ($1.46, 2 players) 5♥:
SB bets $0.40, Hero folds

Results: $1.46 pot ($0.07 rake)
Final Board: 9♠: 9♣: 2♥: 6♥: 5♥:

SB wins $1.37


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

I can hero call whales, its not a problem, unless they have something this time...

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 5 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

BB: $2.52 (126 bb)
UTG: $2.22 (111 bb)
CO: $0.99 (49.5 bb)
BTN: $2.64 (132 bb)
Hero (SB): $2.92 (146 bb)

Hero posts SB $0.01, BB posts $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has A♥: 9♥:
fold, CO raises to $0.04, BTN calls $0.04, Hero raises to $0.18, fold, CO calls $0.14, fold

Flop: ($0.42, 2 players) 8♣: J♦: J♠:
Hero bets $0.16, CO raises to $0.81 and is all-in, Hero calls $0.65

Turn: ($2.04, 2 players) 5♠:

River: ($2.04, 2 players) Q♠:

Results: $2.04 pot ($0.10 rake)
Final Board: 8♣: J♦: J♠: 5♠: Q♠:

CO shows J♥: Q♥:: (Full House, Jacks full of Queens)
(Pre 42%, Flop 98%, Turn 100%)

Hero shows A♥: 9♥:: (One Pair, Jacks)
(Pre 58%, Flop 2%, Turn 0%)

CO wins $1.92

GG Poker - $0.02 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

CO: $2.12 (106 bb)
BTN: $1.81 (90.5 bb)
SB: $2.01 (100.5 bb)
Hero (BB): $2.43 (121.5 bb)
UTG: $2.00 (100 bb)
MP: $5.64 (282 bb)

SB posts $0.01, Hero posts BB $0.02

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.03) Hero has 8♠: T♦:
fold, MP calls $0.02, 3 folds, Hero checks

Flop: ($0.05, 2 players) Q♣: 8♥: 5♥:
Hero checks, MP bets $0.04, Hero calls $0.04

Turn: ($0.13, 2 players) 4♣:
Hero checks, MP bets $0.07, Hero calls $0.07

River: ($0.27, 2 players) 6♦:
Hero checks, MP bets $0.27, Hero calls $0.27

Results: $0.81 pot ($0.04 rake)
Final Board: Q♣: 8♥: 5♥: 4♣: 6♦:

MP shows 4♦: Q♠:: (Two Pair, Queens and Fours)
(Pre 56%, Flop 80%, Turn 95%)

Hero shows 8♠: T♦:: (One Pair, Eights)
(Pre 44%, Flop 20%, Turn 5%)

MP wins $0.75


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

It's obvious, I can switch between being a reg and a fish at will. I need to put some tape over that "fish" button with a sign that reads "DO NOT PRESS EVER".
I can't bitch about this, I put myself in these spots. I don't care about the suck outs, I need to fix the bad play.


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Originally posted by mkBISCUIT
just giving some advice, on those stakes everyone chases hands, so you get your bb/winrate up just by continuing to bet your good hands.

I need to eliminate some spew as well, lots and lots of spew.


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mkBISCUIT
Joined: 19.01.2018

suck outs will always happen. part of the game..


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Sup noobz

We back to the worst parts of the power cuts so playing poker is going to be difficult. I am still down on ggp, but its mostly now because I am grinding one site mostly and just staying away from ggp apart from the dailys and T$ tournaments. So far I have come up short in all, nothing much to talk about, I got it in good, end of story.
Been putting in work away from the tables, and I can't tell if its helping or not or staying the same? I'll keep it up and maybe I will unlock something someday.
Basically, I've been taking small opening and calling ranges, very small, like OP opens only AKs AKo and IP only calls with 89s, 9Ts, JTs, QTs, and randomize a flop and try and figure out which range has a advantage and which doesn't, what will bluff and what won't, etc. I change them up, but I keep it small, as it helps me with trying to figure out what to do with a hand in a specific spot, but for the most part I am still lost in the woods.

The biggest thing with the power cuts is it happens round the times the tournaments I regularly play start, so I end up having to miss them and of course they are repeated again later during the day and evening but, we are once again having the power cuts so... :|
I'm not going to get into the inverter I have with the battery I never replaced, its now become a foot rest, so... :|
Mentally I am slightly in a better place than I was in January, life shit still kicks me in the ballz but I can handle it a little bit better.
Now if only the power stations could get their shit together and stop shitting the bed, I could well be on my way to the wsop or a local held tournament.

Anyways, that's like all I have to say
Later noobz

PS
Wait wait wait, speaking of power stations shitting the bed, I shit the bed once, true story, you don't have to read this part as its got nothing to do with poker, but it can help you with what to do if you ever in this "life shit spot".

Many many years ago when I was a young lad (18, 19 or 20 somewhere round there) and used to walk around with bucket loads of "fuck you", I got a stomach bug.
Back then I never used to stay in bed when I got sick, the flu to me was just hayfever, now its almost a hospital stay. Getting the shits wasn't anything to fear, it was something to lol at. But being me and knowing my immune system, I decided not to do anything about it, I'll just wait it out. It was funny at first, every time I ate something it almost immediately poured out of my exit hole as water. And this is what made keep on eating, I wanted to see how long I could turn bread into water.
And so it went, I ate something and like 5 mins later ran to the toilet, rinse repeat. By the time if got to round 8pm at night I was just lying on the bed exhausted...
My stomach hurt and so did my exit...
Everyone at home was saying just take something and I kept saying if I can turn bread into water its possible to heal myself. The power of positive thinking doesn't apply in these situations, I know that now.
I had stopped eating, but was still running to the toilet, and I was now creating water from nothing, I was either getting sicker or more powerful. It also got very very tricky when I had to fart...
Every time I got up to run to the toilet I came back to lie down on my bed, and every time I did this, I got a little sleepier.
I don't know what time it was, but I decided to put my foot down and not get up to goto the toilet anymore because the last few trips were producing nothing, I was all dried up, but my stomach was still cramping like mad. I passed out.
I woke up and the light was off in my room and my stomach felt great, finally, no cramps, exit hole feels how it should, I start thinking about making me a sandwich.
I roll over onto my side and... :facepalm: why are my sheets wet? I reach for the light switch while at the same time pulling back my blankets...the only positive I could take from seeing this was that I wasn't making water anymore, and things were ALMOST back to normal.
I grabbed the sheets blankets and myself and went str8 to the bathroom, sheets and blankets went into the wash and my ass went into the shower. After I showered, I still had to clean the mattress, and then hang the washing on the line in the middle of the god dam night or very early morning...
This all took about an hour or so, once I was done I was hungry so I made me a sandwich, ate and then jumped back in bed.
I was slowly starting to doze off when my stomach started rumbling and then I farted...

Really this time
Later noobz


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Super Moderator
VorpalF2F
Joined: 02.09.2010

Sorry to hear about your intestinal woes.
Stay hydrated!


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H0witzer
Joined: 27.02.2023

Part 2 made me think of this oldie


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H0witzer
Joined: 27.02.2023

And this one also :-D


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Super Moderator
VorpalF2F
Joined: 02.09.2010

I saw Trainspotting years ago, but I had forgotten all about that scene.


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H0witzer
Joined: 27.02.2023

Originally posted by VorpalF2F
I saw Trainspotting years ago, but I had forgotten all about that scene.

One of my favourites. Nice reminder to watch it again.


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Originally posted by H0witzer
And this one also :-D

Drunk is a excuse for his one, but mine...stupidity :pokerface:


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jiffybag
Joined: 21.12.2010

Originally posted by VorpalF2F
I saw Trainspotting years ago, but I had forgotten all about that scene.

I think I should rewatch it, been awhile.


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